6/20/09

I am STILL laughing over this story...


I KNOW that I will not be able to do this story justice, but I will certainly give it a try. This was from my sister's neighbor that had me laughing so hard I had TEARS rolling down my face. (You fellas will appreciate it, as well, I’m sure…)


My sister’s neighbor, Lori, came over and had a drink with us when i was up for a visit. She was telling us about a woman she works with named Sue.

It seems that Sue had a blind date last summer, and was to meet the gentleman at a local bar. Well, the fella never showed up, and she ended up meeting another man named Joe. She and Joe cozied right up, and ended up on his boat that was anchored out on the Mystic River. (That’s where he was living at the time.) At about 3:00 in the morning she told him she needed to use his bathroom. He told her his bathroom wasn’t working, and she would have to go topside, and pee off the boat.


She went up, squatted down and stuck her, um, rear end off the boat to pee. Then, she fell rear-end first off the boat, RIGHT into the water!! She was yelling and flailing, and yelling some more, and trying to find a way back on the boat. (Remember, it’s after 3:00 in the morning.)


She FINALLY found a rope, and pulled herself onto the rather large boat. She went down the steps, where he had poured them both some wine and made some snacks. She stood in front of him SOAKING wet.


“Where have you been?” he asked.


“Where have I been? WHERE HAVE I BEEN? I was at the bottom of the Mystic River, you ass. Didn’t you hear me?” And with that, she chugged the wine, and went to dry off.


Yeah. They’re still together.



46 comments:

Vivienne @ the V Spot said...

That is AWESOME!!!! The kind of guy that has cocktail hour ready and waiting after a long day? He just may be the perfect man.

LPC said...

OK. I am going to tell my BEST STORY EVER in the comment section of your blog. When I was 25 I traveled alone for 3 months in India. At one point, I contracted to hike from Darjeeling up to where I could see K2's peak. Ostensibly. It was me, and a porter. Who spoke no English. In the first night we stayed in the house of a family along the trail. As the honored guest, they put me in the family worship room on the 2nd floor. With an altar. And, because I am a woman, they locked the door. For my safety. But from the outside. In the middle of the night I woke up and had to pee. And yes, the punchline is, I have a vivid memory of peeing with my feet on the windowsill and my nether regions out the window. Luckily only the pigs seemed to be below me. And I promise I thought hard about using the dishes on the altar. But it was an altar.

Boozy Tooth said...

Ah, an oldie but a goodie. MV, you recycle better than all the rest. God love you.

Mystic River indeed.

Lola said...

Good story.

Mango Girl said...

Wet bottoms and all! Love does make the world go 'round...

Michel said...

haha! OMG! I totally would have died because there is no way in hell I could have pulled myself back up on the boat.

We'd have broken up FO SHO!

*Akilah Sakai* said...

Guess she fell in her own waste ... Haaa!

*

Vodka Mom!
862 Followers!
Isn't that cult-like status?
I beg you not to ask us to drink kool-aid or board a mother ship. ;)

Sanewithoutdrugs said...

I love that the man did not hear her calling him for help!!! LOL And...

She stayed with him.

Mrs. E said...

And that is how many people show up to have a good laugh every day! We need our VM humor! GREAT STORY!!

Irish Gumbo said...

You're right...it is still damn funny!

Unknown said...

the path to true love never runs clear............very funny xx

the mama bird diaries said...

I like a gal who can save herself! That's awesome.

Sue said...

See, it's all about the being honest, saying what's on your mind, and then moving on. Really, life would be much more simple for us all if you realized if you squat to pee off the side of a boat, end up in the water, you should be pissed, and you need to tell the other party what is on your mind, in this case he was an ass. The you have drinks and life is good. So the moral of the story, is it speaking your mind or having drinks that makes life good again? Sue

Sharon Rose said...

That is an excellent story!

Suzy said...

So "Sue" is really you and you peed off a boat? LIKE WE COULDN'T HAVE GUESSED THAT?

2 Brits, 2 Yanks, 2 Dogs said...

That is the type of thing I would do! Love LPC's story too.

Julia@SometimesLucid said...

Great story! I love unique stories like that of people getting together - I think diversity in the beginning makes for a great relationship!

Anonymous said...

Being a dude, if that had happened to me, I probably wouldn't have had the balls to go back!

I'm glad she did . . .

Patsy said...

So he's either lazy or he's deaf.


~Lorna

Pseudo said...

My favorite part about this story is that they are still together.

Laura said...

That is hilarious, love that they're still together.

Lucy Filet said...

That is great! I love that he had wine waiting for her when she got back. My kind of guy!

xxx said...

that's scarey and funny altogether!

Kate Lord Brown said...

OMG that's exactly the kind of klutzy thing I'd do :) Love that they're still together.

Kathryn Magendie said...

LAUGHING!!!!

I once had to pee off a boat - but it was a bass boat...well, there's my nekkid rear off the boat (ugh-but I really had to go!) and right before I "went" - I turned to look and there were two or three snakes swimming right under my nekkid arse! I think I jumped up 10 miles high - and I ended up making my (former) husband find a place in the woods for me to go...which wasn't much better, what with the alligators and more snakes and othe critters in a swamp in South Louisiana(where I used t live)...

Thanks for the laugh !haw!

The Peach Tart said...

Great story. Great ending.

PhilB said...

Cool!! I have always known that a glass of wine cures all ills...even an ill woman.

:)

Phil

Anonymous said...

New Years Eve, 4am and the party has just finished at the Marina. A friend has a great idea to join a party on an anchored yacht but the only access is on a small tender boat on a rope pulley system. With one foot on tender boat and one foot on yacht she realises that she cannot do the spilts and tumbles head first into the sea. The tender boat drifts over her head and she has to be rescued. Oh how we laughed :0)

Anonymous said...

Now that is the best story ever... Classic. :D

confused homemaker said...

now that's the start to a classy relationship. just my kind.

Anonymous said...

OMG that is way too funny. And they are still together? Better yet! Hey, have you entered my one year anniversary contest yet? It ends tomorrow at noon.

Rebecca said...

SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!
I hope she finished peeing while she was in the water!

buffalodick said...

I remember this one!

Unknown said...

I remember this story! It is STILL just as funny too. Thanks for sharing it again.

Melissa B. said...

Gotta love a gal who leads with her butt. I'll bet she was the butt of all jokes for quite some time...BTW, don't forget to swing by and celebrate Sx3 with me today. A Tar-Jay Gift Card is at stake!

Glennis said...

Hilarious!! I guess peeing off the boat works better for guys than it does for girls.

Funny that they're still together.

Fragrant Liar said...

Looks to me like those two were made for each other. That wasn't you and Tightwad, was it? WAS IT??

Anonymous said...

is that a version of "blood is thicker than water" :)

gp

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

They were obviously meant to be together.

Amy Sue Nathan @ Suburban Kvetch said...

Geez, why can't I meet a man like that?

Captain Dumbass said...

That's love.

Your followers could incorporate. They... I guess I should say 'we' could name ourselves Vodkaville.

Anonymous said...

That is such a cute story!! Hilarious!!!

Vodka Logic said...

Funny story and well done with all the followers. Do you fell pressure to please?

Gutsy Living said...

That is a funny story and reminds me of the movie I saw yesterday, The Proposal, with Sandra Bullock, who also falls off a boat. I'm surprised they are still together. It must have been LOVE at first sight.

Unknown said...

LOVE this story...LMAO

Zip n Tizzy said...

Fantastic!