2/3/11

Where has HE been hiding all year?

The morning after two snow days is always full of animated discussions.

I was talking to a precocious boy in our class named Luke, who has been a bit neglected here this year. Until today.


“I could hardly get up my driveway yesterday after all that ice!" I was telling my paraprofessional. "It reminded me of when I was stuck in Washington, DC last year!”


I heard a voice at my elbow. It was Luke.


“Hey! I used to live in Washington, DC!”


“Luke, I remember your mom telling me you were born here! Were you maybe in your mommy’s belly when you lived there?”


“Naw,” he said, shaking his head, “I was just a sperm them. A very slow sperm going towards the egg.”


And that is how you go from snow to sperm in 9.3 seconds.



Let’s see Jimmy Johnson do THAT.


37 comments:

Pastor Sharon said...

I am laughing. . . my face is red. . no purple. . must have air!

You get to be a part of the best part of life, my friend.

I think that is the best story.

Frank really has competition now!
Where has Luke been all my life?

smalltownmom said...

OK, now you've hooked us. More Luke stories, please!

Lynn MacDonald said...

Hahaha...that's hilarious. These stories crack me up! So listen, I'm personal friends with Kyle Petty and I'm going to check that fact out, ok?

ChiTown Girl said...

Oh my hell!! That's priceless!!! I'm a little sad now, knowing that my first day back tomorrow, after two snow days of our own, is not going to be NEARLY as exciting. :(

darsden said...

I like Luke A LOT !

Mellodee said...

5 year olds used to buy talking about the Stork bringing babies, or finding one under a cabbage leaf. I think maybe we're getting just a teensy, tiny, little bit too open with our kids! :)

Dawn said...

Oh, that was good. Well I guess slow and steady wins the race after all!

The Gierich's said...

Peeing...my...pants!! :-O

The Girl Next Door said...

Just when I thought you couldn't make me laugh any harder...

Gigi said...

Seriously??? Do you have a class-ful of them that spit out these gems??

Of course you do - they are kindergartners; they are priceless.

Brian Miller said...

a very slow sperm...self esteem issues there?

Mrs. E said...

OK. At some point, we have to look at the teacher here. I haven't decided whether you bring out the best or the worst in them. It doesn't matter. If it weren't for you and your class, my life would be incredibly boring!!

Sherri said...

Classic Little Kid talk! And you know, he's right?

But still....

Trish@Show and Tell said...

Frank, Suzy, George...now Luke? This just keeps getting better and better.
My 8yo takes great delight in being the first sperm to the egg. Probably because it's the only race she's ever won! (But clearly the most important race of all!).
Trish
x

Joanna Jenkins said...

I think you should wrap up all this year's posts and put them in a time capsule for this group of kids to read at their college graduations :-)
xo jj

Langdowns said...

LOL!!!!!

The Empress said...

OH MY GOSH.

a Broad said...

LOL, thank you for my First Morning Laugh !
besos. Have a good weekend .

That Janie Girl said...

That is the supreme reply.

xoxoxox, heifer.

Everyday Goddess said...

oh jeeze, did someone tell him he was a slow sperm???

Joanie said...

Luke, my new favorite!

Joanie said...

Oh yeah.... VOTED!! You're tied for 49th.

CSY said...

Oh MY!!! This is AWESOME!!!

Vodka Logic said...

OMG what a riot.. you have a great class this year.
Wonder what Frank would have had to add to that conversation.

DawnA said...

Where in the H do they get this stuff in kindergarten?

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Wow, Luke knows a lot about sperm!!

Dawn said...

OMG!! Wonder what the conversations around his dinner table are like???

Missy said...

Oh, my. This brings back memories from teaching kindergarten. Fresh out of college, my first teaching job was at a private, Catholic school. During circle time one little girl was rubbing herself in the nether regions. I quietly asked if she needed to go to the bathroom. "No, I'm just scratching my vagina." LOUDLY. This from a girl whose mom was a stripper.

MiMi said...

Bahahahaha!

Wendy said...

HILARIOUS!

I am so glad you have Share-n-Tell with *us*! I love all your stories.
=-)

peewee said...

HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! LOVE IT!

jennybeans said...

Priceless.

Homschlr4ever said...

Seriously?? I thought the early bird gets the worm. That was one determined sperm. I'd love to know how his mom explained that to him. It's like the gossip game. She probably started out telling him the facts of life and he looked it up on a map.

Rachel Cotterill said...

He does understand that the sperm was only *half* of him, right...?

Momo Fali said...

I didn't even know you could get from snow to sperm, let alone in 9.3 seconds!

only a movie said...

That would be quote of the day in my classroom. Quote of the week.

xoxoxo

Lady Jennie said...

Wow. Smart kid. May my kids never be that smart.