Buckle up.
1. Bair. “Dat’s not bair!”
2. Mishta. “Hasta la mishta, Mrs. Smythe!”
3. Peanuts a tenshun. “Mrs. Smythe, what did you say? I wasn’t peanuts a tenshun.” (No one listens to me. NO ONE.)
4. Crap. “Da kids went to Miss B’s room? Crap!” This is what the ESL child will say when she realizes that all the ESL children went to ESL without her. (Cause she wasn’t peanuts a tenshun.)
Crap? CRAP? I smell a rat: a tiny, adorable Chinese rat.
Note to the ESL teacher: When they can say curse words appropriately, I think they’ve tested OUT of ESL. Don’t you?
Wow, I think I may have passed this class!
ReplyDeleteBut then I had lunch with two very small ones today. I desperately needed to calm my nerves afterward though.
I don't know how you make it through a whole day (every day).
Love, love, love this!
ReplyDeleteHA! I am SO gonna have to use the peanuts attention on my boys Very, Very, soon! I'm sure they'll look at me like I'm crazy, but what else is new?!! SO FUNNY! And, HOW do you make it through a whole day (every day)?!
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately the standardized ESL test has no curse words. I know that all our secondary kids would be meeting benchmark if they would add this component!
ReplyDeletehaha...i am good enough to call english my second language...it took me to the note at the end to figure out what peanut a tenshun meant...i obviously need remedial kindergartenese
ReplyDeleteHey, no one listens to me either. It takes the 4th or 5th student before I can get one of them to repeat my directions. And that kid usually only heard half.
ReplyDeleteLove the crap kid ; -)
hey, I remember this class...I think my sister taught it...
ReplyDeleteSandi
I understood the peanuts a tenshun. Maybe that's because when we were young my little sister would get very "nurse" when my dad was trying to teach her to ride a bike and he would let go. To this day, we sometimes say we are nurse instead of nervous.
ReplyDeleteI have the toddler class so their words aren't even confused with other words- most of them are just made up!! A common phrase used in my class is: "ematanow", prounounced: eh-mah-ta-now, AKA it's my turn now!!
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