5/18/09

She tried to kill me...


Note to self:


When exercise obsessed daughter offers to go for a “little” walk with you to jump-start your diet, discuss the word “little” with her first.

 

Then, make SURE to go over the walking “route” with her.  Odds are great that she will take you on her six mile running course and not your eight-block walk around the neighborhood gardens.

 

If I weren’t so tired I would kick her *** right now.

 

 

Someone call a medic. 

 

 

74 comments:

  1. Boozy ToothMay 18, 2009 at 6:39 AM

    Six miles? Easy peasy Miss Vodka. Just focus on that tiny hiney and rockin' toned legs. Woot woot.

    ReplyDelete
  2. K DubsMay 18, 2009 at 6:40 AM

    oh MY!! But I bet it'll feel good the next time you do it! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  3. SuzyMay 18, 2009 at 6:43 AM

    25 minutes a day, at your own pace will be enough to lose....oh wait, I just remmbered what your ass looks like.

    6 miles is good.

    ReplyDelete
  4. SultanMay 18, 2009 at 6:43 AM

    A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first stagger.

    ReplyDelete
  5. KatMay 18, 2009 at 6:51 AM

    You're right. She's trying to kill you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. cheatymoonMay 18, 2009 at 6:51 AM

    Hope the weather was great. What a nice daughter. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. WeaselMommaMay 18, 2009 at 7:02 AM

    I hope you live to pay her back.

    ReplyDelete
  8. As Cape Cod TurnsMay 18, 2009 at 7:05 AM

    Did she hold a bottle of vodka in front of you the whole way?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Lee RyanMay 18, 2009 at 7:11 AM

    Well - as long as you had a martini to revive your spirits upon return...

    ReplyDelete
  10. ScopeMay 18, 2009 at 7:12 AM

    To kick her ass would require moving your legs rapidly, which I'm guessing is a bit of an issue at the moment.

    ReplyDelete
  11. mo.stoneskinMay 18, 2009 at 7:25 AM

    You've managed to type up a post right? That means you've caught your breath right? So you're actually pretty fit...

    right?

    ReplyDelete
  12. MicheleMay 18, 2009 at 7:36 AM

    My DIL has a degree in Exercise Fitness. She is full of great advise that I promptly ignore.

    ReplyDelete
  13. mommakinMay 18, 2009 at 7:37 AM

    A tiny part of me wishes my daughters would light a fire under my ample butt. The rest of my is laughing at you. I mean with you.

    ReplyDelete
  14. ♥ BrajaMay 18, 2009 at 7:42 AM

    Medic? The hell...

    You just need a martini. Now, sit down love, put your feet up, and listen for that "stirred" sound...

    mmmmmmmm.....

    ReplyDelete
  15. MarciMay 18, 2009 at 7:56 AM

    LOL!
    I desperately need to walk 6 miles...

    ReplyDelete
  16. MichelleMay 18, 2009 at 8:05 AM

    Eight-block walk around the neighborhood gardens.

    HAHA!!! WUSS!!!

    I like your daughter!! 6 miles is easy!! Bring a book if you get bored. :O)

    ReplyDelete
  17. SusanMay 18, 2009 at 8:11 AM

    Oh, I would so be downing bottles of wine on my return. Or from the sewer 8 blocks away...

    ReplyDelete
  18. UnknownMay 18, 2009 at 8:13 AM

    You survived. When you catch your breath, kick her ass with both feet.

    ReplyDelete
  19. ChristyMay 18, 2009 at 8:24 AM

    Wow congratulations - that is one long walk. At least you didn't have to call a cab halfway thru!

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousMay 18, 2009 at 8:46 AM

    I guess my advice would be to keep at it...before you know it you'll be strong enough to really kick her ass!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Empress Bee (of the high sea)May 18, 2009 at 8:49 AM

    six what??? honey a walk is six blocks. tell her. she's young. she has to be taught these things...

    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxoxxoxoxo

    i feel your pain. ps

    ReplyDelete
  22. darsdenMay 18, 2009 at 8:50 AM

    LOL I do six miles in my sleep singing...Damn can I watch you kick Suzy's Ass...I hold your martini for you :-)) fight, fight, fight...did I say that out loud!

    ReplyDelete
  23. LeslieMay 18, 2009 at 8:57 AM

    Oy. Ouch!

    ReplyDelete
  24. *Lissa*May 18, 2009 at 9:09 AM

    You'll be sporting a bikini in no time!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Mango GirlMay 18, 2009 at 9:12 AM

    VERY proud of you...!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Kathy B!May 18, 2009 at 9:32 AM

    She hasn't secretly discovered your will has she?! I'm thinking she's trying to kill you, not get you in shape!

    And remind me never to let Suzy see a picture of my ass.

    ReplyDelete
  27. JessicaMay 18, 2009 at 10:14 AM

    6 miles?! And she RUNS it?

    My goodness.

    ReplyDelete
  28. IvanhoeMay 18, 2009 at 10:20 AM

    Hahaha! Maybe I should let her take our dog for one of those long walks. He needs lots of exercise ;o)

    ReplyDelete
  29. AiringMyLaundryMay 18, 2009 at 10:35 AM

    Six miles?

    I'd die.

    I'm gasping when I just do a mile.

    ReplyDelete
  30. LadyFiMay 18, 2009 at 10:48 AM

    Ah - to have the energy of youth!

    ReplyDelete
  31. UnknownMay 18, 2009 at 11:07 AM

    That's funny. Your post helped me see the other side of the coin. haha. I used to be the one dragging friends who just wanted to START working out onto a several mile adventure that they hated me for and wanted to kill ME!
    I guess I should be sorry! :)

    ReplyDelete
  32. SkylersDadMay 18, 2009 at 11:10 AM

    I had a good, funny comment ready until I got to Suzy's, then I lost it along with a lot of spit in my keyboard!

    ReplyDelete
  33. LilliGirlMay 18, 2009 at 11:13 AM

    LOL - I'd kick her ass and Suzy's too. (Suzy will never get to see my ass) It's good for you though, You go girl!

    ReplyDelete
  34. blognutMay 18, 2009 at 11:44 AM

    But don't you feel good about the fact that you made it?!

    You rock.

    ReplyDelete
  35. LPCMay 18, 2009 at 11:52 AM

    *tongue firmly in cheek* Sounds like she kicked yours...

    ReplyDelete
  36. AnonymousMay 18, 2009 at 12:08 PM

    Sounds like you neglected to acknowledge Rule #1 when attempting a tour (be it via automobile or pedestrian):

    Rule#1: Don't forget to pack the maps and the martinis.

    Rule#2: Refer to Rule #1.

    Any questions?
    ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  37. CounselormamaMay 18, 2009 at 12:28 PM

    Man, I wish I had someone obsessed with exercise in my house! I'm such a lazy lima bean, but I do try to get out three times a week and run, even though I don't feel like it!

    ReplyDelete
  38. SandeeMay 18, 2009 at 12:32 PM

    Thirty minutes a day is enough. Not a six mile stint the first time out. Yikes.

    Have a terrific day. :)

    ReplyDelete
  39. *Akilah Sakai*May 18, 2009 at 12:34 PM

    I agree with Sandee. Six miles to jump start is plain crazy! That would scare me right into a dozen glazed donuts!!!

    ReplyDelete
  40. suzanneelizabeths.comMay 18, 2009 at 12:52 PM

    I like my one mile run in the morning...quick and easy and I feel great all day!

    ReplyDelete
  41. Fifi FlowersMay 18, 2009 at 1:34 PM

    She is giving you quite a workout these days... she better watch out... once you are in shape!

    ReplyDelete
  42. DKCMay 18, 2009 at 1:56 PM

    Good point - you made it without keeling over!

    Bad point - might want to refuse next time she asks, I think she's trying to kill you!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Travis ErwinMay 18, 2009 at 2:13 PM

    I would say no pain no gain, but I don't want you to slap me.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Carolyn...OnlineMay 18, 2009 at 2:16 PM

    Well that's just mean. Tell her not to mislead her mother next time.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Jennifer OrtizMay 18, 2009 at 2:24 PM

    Six miles? sheesh

    ReplyDelete
  46. MariahMay 18, 2009 at 2:42 PM

    Oy... my daughter too! She tok me on a mothers day hike. It ended up being 7 miles of hell. Her and her 17 y/o body are killing me slowly

    ReplyDelete
  47. Rick DaleyMay 18, 2009 at 2:57 PM

    Tell your brain to start producing stronger endorphines, they are the body's equivlent of morphine and the source of the fabled "runner's high."

    ReplyDelete
  48. A Woman Of No ImportanceMay 18, 2009 at 3:13 PM

    Did she get you to sign over any papers either before or after the run, VKMom... If yes, then she's after her inheritance early - You need a Vodka Tester!

    Can you see my hand's up??!

    Great luck with the running and rambling... Do remember to breathe! x

    ReplyDelete
  49. CDBMay 18, 2009 at 4:03 PM

    I would have loved to have seen snippets from the during-the-walk conversation (assuming you could still talk.)

    This must be the nutrition-crazed one as well.

    ReplyDelete
  50. chocolatecovereddaydreams.blogspot.comMay 18, 2009 at 4:36 PM

    That just gives you the perfect excuse to be waited on hand and foot. You may want to get a bell to ring too.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Life As I Know ItMay 18, 2009 at 5:00 PM

    I hoped you walked it and didn't run it...ouch.

    Must be something in the air - I just posted on my running attempts.

    ReplyDelete
  52. DebMay 18, 2009 at 5:15 PM

    well, duh!

    first rule of self-preservation... only exercise with people lazier and more out of shape than you. always.

    ReplyDelete
  53. JenniMay 18, 2009 at 5:18 PM

    You need to rent one of those scooters! Then you can speed up and taunt her to hurry...

    ReplyDelete
  54. namasteMay 18, 2009 at 5:24 PM

    LOL!!

    i agree. six miles is waayyyy too long. especially if you don't know how far you're walking. it's the kind of thing that would make tears spring to my eyes.

    ;)

    ReplyDelete
  55. UnknownMay 18, 2009 at 5:24 PM

    Stick this in your i-pod

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jzSh_MLNcY

    Let it be your mantra

    And soon she'll be eating your dust!

    Keep at it girl!!!!

    Peace - Rene

    ReplyDelete
  56. Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin)May 18, 2009 at 6:11 PM

    It was all for you. . . she was only doing it for you, ya know. . .

    ReplyDelete
  57. LauraMay 18, 2009 at 6:52 PM

    at least you have a child who moves
    my kids will only run if chips and icarly are involved

    ReplyDelete
  58. zelzeeMay 18, 2009 at 7:06 PM

    I think these kids today are nuts!!

    Quit worrying, the style is long tops to cover our butts.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Lawyer MomMay 18, 2009 at 8:04 PM

    Ooof! I'm surprised you can even type.

    ReplyDelete
  60. SimplicityMay 18, 2009 at 8:53 PM

    At least she didn't make you RUN the course! Otherwise, we may have had to read Braja writing on your behalf from the hospital! :)

    ReplyDelete
  61. HoodChickMay 18, 2009 at 8:58 PM

    SIX!? Two miles with the dog nearly kills me. The fact that you made it is impressive.

    ReplyDelete
  62. SweetPeaSurryMay 18, 2009 at 9:09 PM

    Oh you poor dear ... do put your feet up and relax!!!

    ReplyDelete
  63. ♥ BrajaMay 18, 2009 at 9:24 PM

    Think of your gymnast butt.

    Wait. You lost it, that's right.

    OK lardass, your daughter is good for you...

    ReplyDelete
  64. Everyday GoddessMay 18, 2009 at 9:58 PM

    It was just a bad dream. It's all over now.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Lorraine May 18, 2009 at 10:14 PM

    All I can say is better you than me! Next time make sure you have your cell with you and identification on you.

    ReplyDelete
  66. This IS The Fun Part!May 18, 2009 at 10:49 PM

    Ah, yes - quality time with our dear children!

    Grannie

    ReplyDelete
  67. Vered May 18, 2009 at 11:54 PM

    Poor thing. You sound exhausted.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Captain DumbassMay 19, 2009 at 1:18 AM

    I think the ass kicking, while not as aerobic as the walking, would be far more therapeutic.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Dee-Zigns Handcrafted JewelryMay 19, 2009 at 12:17 PM

    Can your daughter come to my house? I need a walking partner and a kick in the butt!

    ReplyDelete
  70. I Love Pretty Little ThingsFebruary 4, 2010 at 5:20 PM

    Ha Ha! We all have at least one person in our life like that!

    ReplyDelete
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Come on people, make me laugh. I dare ya.