7/15/09

I need a laugh today...

So, the post i originally put up last night is way too dark right now. I need a laugh, so I am bringing back to life our dog's last mini-vacation. I can' t bear the thought of losing these deleted posts. Sue me.

I spent most of Saturday (about 12 hours of it) traveling with Sassy to an indoor field hockey tournament in Smith, Oregon. Tightwad and The Golden Boy stayed home with the dogs. Rover is an older Dalmatian mix we rescued from the SPCA when Sassy (who was four at the time) dropped her on her head. We were CONVINCED that she had injured her, and felt so guilty we took her home. We adopted Junior from that same SPCA several years ago for no good reason.

Yesterday about 5:30 p.m. Junior escaped captivity and roamed the neighborhood freely eating what was later determined to be soft pretzels and crap. We live on a VERY busy street. Let's just say, for argument's sake, that we live at 123 Main Street. When Sassy and I returned home from said field hockey tournament, we were informed by Tightwad that Junior was missing!! They had been combing the neighborhood and the land near and far for the *@$* dog. (We have tons of cornfields and open fields that belong to Oregon State behind our house- it's quite gorgeous to have it right here in town, even if the street in front of our house is quite busy.)

We were despondent ALL night and this morning when Junior never came home. He's often escaped to run through the cornfields and wreak havoc in the neighborhood- but ALWAYS comes home. Yeah, he usually smells like um, uh poop, but he gets his bath, a little scolding and then tons of love.

After putting my private investigator skills to good use (Remember one of my old jobs???) I received a call from the Animal Hospital that a dog that fit OUR dog's description was brought in last night (about 6:45) by the POLICE. They found him on a busy street. "What street? " you might ask.

The girl at the Animal Hospital said that the officers picked him up at 123 Main Street. AT OUR HOUSE. In the FRONT YARD. Jesus. Don't they know that's our dog? And Tightwad - didn't the flashing red lights (neighbor was watching) wake you up from your nap????? Didn't you hear the officer KNOCKING at the front door? Oh wait, you were out eating Chinese at the time.

Yeah, well, you owe me 15 bucks. That's how much I need to spring him.



59 comments:

♥ Braja said...

Woof.

♥ Braja said...

Drool.

♥ Braja said...

Lick.

cheatymoon said...

Braja, you are a funny girl.

Congrats on Tightwads job!! And thanks for the entertaining story.

Lori P said...

HA! I needed a laugh this morning.

Janine / Being Brazen said...

ha ha ha!

Hit 40 said...

I have to say it....

men!!!!! and....

Do your cops need more to do??? This is crazy.

Kathy B! said...

You should have had the cops arrested for stealing. They took the dog out of your own front yard. I think that qualifies, right?!

Scope said...

Junior - Busted on your own front lawn? But who hasn't been there before, with an empty bottle of Wild Turkey laying next to him.

$15 is cheap bail. I'm just saying.

Mrs. E said...

I'm with Hit 40-- MEN!!! (And he won't give you the $15, so hope you didn't hold your breath for that!) We had a suggestion in our town that perhaps the police could deliver the daily newspapers. It would give them something to do while they skulked around town!!

Unknown said...

Your dog has invisible cloaking ability and that fookin' rocks.

Peace - Rene

Unknown said...

the things we'll do for our pets eh?
My cat has taken to sleeping in the bath (without water in, obviously) as it's the only place the children can't find her.

Ash said...

I hope they invested that $15 wisely.

(I'm late to the party because of vacation, but I LOVE the new look!!! Fabulous.)

darsden said...

Oh my, funny..picked up in your front yard they must have been trained in Mississippi.

Debbie said...

Lovely new look around here, darling!

Rick Daley said...

I have a neurotic schnauzer named Leo. He's very cute and loving, but he often displays signs of inferior intelligence, and has thus earned the nickname Leo-tard.

Keyona said...

Awesome! Taken into custody from your own house! LOL!

Jeanne Estridge said...

So if hubby found a job, why are you feeling so dark?

BTW -- I posted a new "Old Joke" on Monday....

mommakin said...

Oh NO!

Unknown said...

I may have already told you this the first time you posted this story....but we once looked for our dog for almost 24 hours (posted signs and everything) and all along he had someone closed himself in the back part of the basement and didn't make a peep the entire time).

The Half Assed Housewife said...

See, I would have had to buy a new dog. Then he would have turned up right under my nose.

Why is buying a replacement the best way to find something you have lost? And why is it always sitting right out in the open or (gasp) where it belongs when you do find it?

blognut said...

Ah yes, a classic story.

I think you should've charged the police officer with dognapping and made them return the dog for free.

Sharon Rose said...

Whatever would we do without our doggies! I can't believe he was taken from your front yard!!!!!

Glad he's okay!

Diane said...

No way! Way funnier than fiction.

Eddy said...

Geez, they didn't even ask the neighbours first if they knew who's dog it was before taking him away? OY!

By the way, did you know that you are starring this week on JB's blog? Maybe she already dropped by to tell you on Monday. Anyway, enjoy the spotlight!

Cheers,
Eddy

KrisGC said...

I'm so glad I live out of town! No cops are stealing my dogs!!

Sandee said...

Tightwad would do me in. Just saying.

Have a great day. Bigger hug. :)

Formerly known as Frau said...

Did he smell like shit and need a bath too?

Bobby G said...

Well he's BACK! thats all that matters~

Roshni said...

wow! Nice new look! I love the large font too!!
So Tightwad was celebrating his new job with Chinese food, eh?! Interesting!!

SkylersDad said...

So you need a laugh eh?

An elderly gent was invited to an old friends home for dinner one
evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request
to his wife with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling,
Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years
and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the wife was in the kitchen , the man leaned over to his host, 'I
think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your
wife those loving pet names'.

The old man hung his head. 'I have to tell you the truth,' he said,
'Her name slipped my mind about 10 years ago ,and I'm scared to death
to ask the cranky miserable old bitty what her name is.

Anonymous said...

Congrats to the Vodka-family! I know when my hubby was out of work (for 14 months... 14 LOOOOONG months) I was ready to kill him by the time he found a new job. It's SOOO much easier to get along when he works and you aren't spending too much time together ;-)

Maureen at IslandRoar said...

That is the best lost pet story I've ever heard!

LegalMist said...

I can't bear the thought of losing all your old (deleted) posts either, and I fully encourage the re-posting of any that you want to re-post! I missed a lot of them the first time around, and even the ones I read then are good again now. :)

Coco said...

You got off lucky. When a dog my daughter had escaped it cost me 60.00 plus a statement from the vet that she had been vaccinated. Then another 120.00 for both dogs to go to the vet because she got kennel cough while she was incarcerated. I told that dog if she got arrested again I was not bailing her out. Period.

Coco said...

You got off lucky. When a dog my daughter had escaped it cost me 60.00 plus a statement from the vet that she had been vaccinated. Then another 120.00 for both dogs to go to the vet because she got kennel cough while she was incarcerated. I told that dog if she got arrested again I was not bailing her out. Period.

Anna Whiston-Donaldson said...

Glad you have such an on the ball police force.

Captain Dumbass said...

I love this story. And the new look. I think I need a new look. Maybe some pec implants and a little collagen.

chocolatecovereddaydreams.blogspot.com said...

And the cops didn't think to knock on the door and ask if he was yours????

the mama bird diaries said...

i absolutely love this post.

Anonymous said...

Glad you got your doggie back. When we lived in New York City, our dachshund escaped from doggie daycare and ran the streets of Manhattan. The police told us they closed off two city blocks of traffic to catch him. He then ran into a bagel shop and hid under an oven. (Talk about a hotdog.)

And guess how we found him? On Craig's List! Someone suggested we do a search on Craig's List for missing dachshunds, and sure enough, there he was. He then spent the night at a police officer's house in Staten Island. That'll learn him. (If you know anything about the stereotypes of Staten Island, then you know what I mean. Think "Working Girl" - chic.)

Pseudo said...

I loved this both times. Loved it.

Want some more dog humor to cheer you up? Yesterday on a beach outing/ beach walk, BC kept lifting his leg on the kids' sand castles. What is up with that?

Joanna Jenkins said...

Flashing red light! I'm sure the neighbors are still talking about you :-)
Glad the dog is safe-- This story made me laugh!

DKC said...

Wait, wait, wait - Tightwad got a job!?! That is great news! Now he can pay you that 15 bucks he owes you!

Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin) said...

My sister's dog just ran away for the second time. . . and walked himself right to the steps of the police station and sat there waiting to be picked up.

Liz Wilkey (a.k.a. A Mom on Spin) said...

Wait!

And tightwad is back in the workforce?????

Desert Songbird said...

Why would you lose the original post? Isn't it in your archives?

I've been reading long enough to remember this post from the first time. I feel so special. *dumb grin*

Jenni said...

I am glad you got your dog bailed out of the slammer...

Michel said...

OMG that was funny!!

Nevertheless, my lawyer will be in touch.

laughingwolf said...

seems we know who takes care of the critters... nuff said

Everyday Goddess said...

The cops stole your dog? Is that not just a little weird? Even for Oregon?

Stop by my place tomorrow, have a got a video for you!!

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed this post both times.

I'm so happy for your family and Tightwad. Sending good vibes for his first day. :)!

Sultan said...

Always pleasing to have a happy ending canine tale.

Bobby Allan said...

That's hysterical!

The Mind of a Mom said...

Okay it was funny back then and it is even funnier this time!

The Mind of a Mom said...

Okay it was funny back then and it is even funnier this time!

Sandy said...

Did he find a way to blame you? Mine would have.

AS Amber said...

I'm thinking you live in Mayberry.

AS Amber said...

Oh and Tightwad got a job??? Woot! Now to get my husband one....