I go to bed each night hoping for a visit. Each morning I open my eyes and reach into my heart to see if perhaps they came.
But they been unusually quiet as of late, and I am trying to see that as a good sign.
This path I am walking has continued to be a rocky one. It's like being in a dark, scary forest. I navigate as best I can, all the while dodging a different challenge that blocks my path. I remind myself that nothing in life is easy, and that the journey itself is what life is all about.
However, I could without some of the obstacles. And frankly, it would be easier if these obstacles didn't cost so much *$&#% money. (Hey all you crazy people in Washington, D.C. - can you think about the people you serve for ONE MINUTE? And I mean the little people, not those rich ones who take you to lunch.)
I've decided it's time to count my blessings. My kids are on the top of the list- but then some of these blessings include "things I've learned" throughout this process.
I've learned that every woman living on her own needs her own tool box. Be sure it includes all variations of screwdrivers (and I include the one that involves orange juice); a wrench; a hammer; a mini-flashlight; and various washers.
I've learned that a brand new toilet is only $60.00. And if you have an incredible brother who knows how install one, you are golden.
I"ve learned that you need to keep a stash of light bulbs, Drano, gas for your mower and lots of garbage bags.
I've learned that the only real way to rid your house of millipedes involves a call to a local exterminator and about $130.00. (THAT was money well-spent.) I've also learned that about a billion dead millipedes smell just like skunk.
I've learned how to turn off the water for the whole house and how to re-set the fuses in the fuse box.
I've learned that if you run your air conditioners for a thousand humid days, they will freeze up and leak all over your hard wood floors. (Nice touch, Mother Nature. Nice touch.)
I've learned how to put salt into the water softener, and how to determine how much oil is in the oil tank I've also determined that my hot water tank is electric-and will be conducting a crazy experiment to see how long I can actually go without ordering the oil that is apparently loaded with specks of gold. (I'm stocking up on wood and big wooly sweaters.)
But in the end I've learned far more.
I've learned that your friends will wrap you in love and comfort. Reach out to them and they will lift you up.
I've learned that self-respect and loving who you are is priceless.
And while last but certainly not least, integrity is something we teach our children through our actions. And I am so proud that I have chosen to act.