5/18/09

She tried to kill me...


Note to self:


When exercise obsessed daughter offers to go for a “little” walk with you to jump-start your diet, discuss the word “little” with her first.

 

Then, make SURE to go over the walking “route” with her.  Odds are great that she will take you on her six mile running course and not your eight-block walk around the neighborhood gardens.

 

If I weren’t so tired I would kick her *** right now.

 

 

Someone call a medic. 

 

 

71 comments:

Alix said...

Six miles? Easy peasy Miss Vodka. Just focus on that tiny hiney and rockin' toned legs. Woot woot.

Kathy said...

oh MY!! But I bet it'll feel good the next time you do it! LOL

Suzy said...

25 minutes a day, at your own pace will be enough to lose....oh wait, I just remmbered what your ass looks like.

6 miles is good.

Laoch of Chicago said...

A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first stagger.

Kat said...

You're right. She's trying to kill you.

only a movie said...

Hope the weather was great. What a nice daughter. :-)

WeaselMomma said...

I hope you live to pay her back.

Sue said...

Did she hold a bottle of vodka in front of you the whole way?

Lee Ryan said...

Well - as long as you had a martini to revive your spirits upon return...

Scope said...

To kick her ass would require moving your legs rapidly, which I'm guessing is a bit of an issue at the moment.

mo.stoneskin said...

You've managed to type up a post right? That means you've caught your breath right? So you're actually pretty fit...

right?

Michele said...

My DIL has a degree in Exercise Fitness. She is full of great advise that I promptly ignore.

Tammy Howard said...

A tiny part of me wishes my daughters would light a fire under my ample butt. The rest of my is laughing at you. I mean with you.

♥ Braja said...

Medic? The hell...

You just need a martini. Now, sit down love, put your feet up, and listen for that "stirred" sound...

mmmmmmmm.....

Marci said...

LOL!
I desperately need to walk 6 miles...

Michelle said...

Eight-block walk around the neighborhood gardens.

HAHA!!! WUSS!!!

I like your daughter!! 6 miles is easy!! Bring a book if you get bored. :O)

Susan said...

Oh, I would so be downing bottles of wine on my return. Or from the sewer 8 blocks away...

Gaston Studio said...

You survived. When you catch your breath, kick her ass with both feet.

Christy said...

Wow congratulations - that is one long walk. At least you didn't have to call a cab halfway thru!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

I guess my advice would be to keep at it...before you know it you'll be strong enough to really kick her ass!!

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

six what??? honey a walk is six blocks. tell her. she's young. she has to be taught these things...

smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxxoxoxo

i feel your pain. ps

darsden said...

LOL I do six miles in my sleep singing...Damn can I watch you kick Suzy's Ass...I hold your martini for you :-)) fight, fight, fight...did I say that out loud!

Laggin said...

Oy. Ouch!

*Lissa* said...

You'll be sporting a bikini in no time!

Mango Girl said...

VERY proud of you...!

Kathy B! said...

She hasn't secretly discovered your will has she?! I'm thinking she's trying to kill you, not get you in shape!

And remind me never to let Suzy see a picture of my ass.

Jessica said...

6 miles?! And she RUNS it?

My goodness.

Ivanhoe said...

Hahaha! Maybe I should let her take our dog for one of those long walks. He needs lots of exercise ;o)

WhisperingWriter said...

Six miles?

I'd die.

I'm gasping when I just do a mile.

LadyFi said...

Ah - to have the energy of youth!

Yvonne said...

That's funny. Your post helped me see the other side of the coin. haha. I used to be the one dragging friends who just wanted to START working out onto a several mile adventure that they hated me for and wanted to kill ME!
I guess I should be sorry! :)

SkylersDad said...

I had a good, funny comment ready until I got to Suzy's, then I lost it along with a lot of spit in my keyboard!

LilliGirl said...

LOL - I'd kick her ass and Suzy's too. (Suzy will never get to see my ass) It's good for you though, You go girl!

blognut said...

But don't you feel good about the fact that you made it?!

You rock.

LPC said...

*tongue firmly in cheek* Sounds like she kicked yours...

Mad Texter said...

Sounds like you neglected to acknowledge Rule #1 when attempting a tour (be it via automobile or pedestrian):

Rule#1: Don't forget to pack the maps and the martinis.

Rule#2: Refer to Rule #1.

Any questions?
;-)

Counselormama said...

Man, I wish I had someone obsessed with exercise in my house! I'm such a lazy lima bean, but I do try to get out three times a week and run, even though I don't feel like it!

Sandee said...

Thirty minutes a day is enough. Not a six mile stint the first time out. Yikes.

Have a terrific day. :)

*Akilah Sakai* said...

I agree with Sandee. Six miles to jump start is plain crazy! That would scare me right into a dozen glazed donuts!!!

Suzanne said...

I like my one mile run in the morning...quick and easy and I feel great all day!

Fifi Flowers said...

She is giving you quite a workout these days... she better watch out... once you are in shape!

Dana's Brain said...

Good point - you made it without keeling over!

Bad point - might want to refuse next time she asks, I think she's trying to kill you!

Travis Erwin said...

I would say no pain no gain, but I don't want you to slap me.

Carolyn...Online said...

Well that's just mean. Tell her not to mislead her mother next time.

Cjengo said...

Six miles? sheesh

Mariah said...

Oy... my daughter too! She tok me on a mothers day hike. It ended up being 7 miles of hell. Her and her 17 y/o body are killing me slowly

Rick Daley said...

Tell your brain to start producing stronger endorphines, they are the body's equivlent of morphine and the source of the fabled "runner's high."

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Did she get you to sign over any papers either before or after the run, VKMom... If yes, then she's after her inheritance early - You need a Vodka Tester!

Can you see my hand's up??!

Great luck with the running and rambling... Do remember to breathe! x

CDB said...

I would have loved to have seen snippets from the during-the-walk conversation (assuming you could still talk.)

This must be the nutrition-crazed one as well.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

That just gives you the perfect excuse to be waited on hand and foot. You may want to get a bell to ring too.

Life As I Know It said...

I hoped you walked it and didn't run it...ouch.

Must be something in the air - I just posted on my running attempts.

Deb said...

well, duh!

first rule of self-preservation... only exercise with people lazier and more out of shape than you. always.

Jenni Jiggety said...

You need to rent one of those scooters! Then you can speed up and taunt her to hurry...

namaste said...

LOL!!

i agree. six miles is waayyyy too long. especially if you don't know how far you're walking. it's the kind of thing that would make tears spring to my eyes.

;)

Not The Rockefellers said...

Stick this in your i-pod

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jzSh_MLNcY

Let it be your mantra

And soon she'll be eating your dust!

Keep at it girl!!!!

Peace - Rene

lizspin said...

It was all for you. . . she was only doing it for you, ya know. . .

Laura said...

at least you have a child who moves
my kids will only run if chips and icarly are involved

zelzee said...

I think these kids today are nuts!!

Quit worrying, the style is long tops to cover our butts.

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

Ooof! I'm surprised you can even type.

Simplicity said...

At least she didn't make you RUN the course! Otherwise, we may have had to read Braja writing on your behalf from the hospital! :)

HoodChick said...

SIX!? Two miles with the dog nearly kills me. The fact that you made it is impressive.

SweetPeaSurry said...

Oh you poor dear ... do put your feet up and relax!!!

♥ Braja said...

Think of your gymnast butt.

Wait. You lost it, that's right.

OK lardass, your daughter is good for you...

Comedy Goddess said...

It was just a bad dream. It's all over now.

Lorraine said...

All I can say is better you than me! Next time make sure you have your cell with you and identification on you.

This IS The Fun Part! said...

Ah, yes - quality time with our dear children!

Grannie

Vered - MomGrind said...

Poor thing. You sound exhausted.

Captain Dumbass said...

I think the ass kicking, while not as aerobic as the walking, would be far more therapeutic.

Dee-Zigns Handcrafted Jewelry said...

Can your daughter come to my house? I need a walking partner and a kick in the butt!

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I Love Pretty Little Things said...

Ha Ha! We all have at least one person in our life like that!