I've fallen and I can't get up...
Things I learned in Kindergarten today. (Here in Smythe, Oregon.)
1. When you find a cool play tool collection at a yard sale, make sure you remove the batteries from the FIVE assorted power tools that make loud noises for ALL of the 30 minutes of Free Play.
2. If a boy who has been out for four days comes to school basically because it’s his birthday, odds are GREAT that he will throw up all over the floor at the painting center. Twice.
3. Don’t wear gorgeous clogs to school if you think perhaps you might have to run with a garbage can.
4. When an adorable girl comes to you with something in her fingers during read aloud, don’t assume it’s one of the thousand staples they pick up daily off the carpet and thrust into your face. The blood around her lips might give you a clue about what she is holding.
5. When pumping gas at the end of the day at the local Uni-Mart (the one CROWDED with cars and people) don’t try to jump the hose that connects the pump to your gas tank. You probably won’t jump high enough and will land FLAT ON YOUR FACE in front of God, the billion other friends and neighbors getting gas, and the kid in your class who was sitting in the car at the next pump watching you (Guess what HE’LL be sharing at telling sharing tomorrow.)
OMG, I am still laughing about that. I fell FLAT ON MY FACE people. Have I told you I used to be a gymnast? HAVE I?
Man, You can’t take me anywhere.