Um, What did you Say???

I’ve decided to hold a little on line in-service, in honor of the one I will be attending myself today. It has come to my attention that some of YOU are fluent in our kindergartenese. Now, in case you missed our first session, here it is. Oh, and please initial the sign-in sheet at the bottom so you can receive your ACT 48 CREDIT HOURS.

In order to be a successful kindergarten teacher, one must be bi-lingual. You must be fluent in what we like to call kindergarten-ese. Here are some of the more common words used in this language, followed by a sentence in which that word is used. This might shed some light on its definition!

Disausted: Mrs. Smith, I’m disausted.
Shmergency: If someone cuts off your head, it’s a shmergency.
Chickmunk: Did you see that huge chickmunk?
Balentimes: Here are my balentimes, Mrs. Smith.
Bodder: Shoe-fly, don’t bodder me…
Udder: The udder day, I got a new transformer!
Invincible: (not to be confused with the real word.) If you can’t see me Mrs. Smith, it’s because I’m invincible.
Micole: My big sister Micole is mean to me.
Remembery: Don’t worry, Mrs. Smith. I have a great remembery!
Tomayo: I’m gonna bring my doll to show-and-tell tomayo.
Wunch: Mrs. Smith, I don’t wike what’s for wunch.
Wike: Mrs. Smith, I don’t wike what’s for wunch.
Towin: My name is Towin. (Collin. Yes, the speech teacher will be coming in to take a look at this one...)
Fad: Is Fad here today? (Thad)
Nafanial: No! It's not Nafaniel, It's Nataniel (From one of our Korean students, talking about Nathaniel...)
Bomit - I'm gonna bomit.
Mushally - Mushally the moon is yellow, but last night it was red.
Betended - She just betended to throw up.
Cyean - We need to cyean up before yunch.
Yunch – We need to cyean up before yunch.

I fink that after six years, I’m pwactically fwuent.


mo.stoneskin said...


I'm clearly not fluent enough.

So what did he actually give you?

I'm also disausted AND eating my wunch.

Rick Daley said...

When the energy level is high: I'm so exciting!

When the car travels fast: Are we going speed?

Unknown said...

Fank you

I love on picture day when they talk
about "gettin their picture tooken"


The Good Cook said...

My favorite from my littles:

gwief - I can't get a good gwief (grip)

Hurricano - Extremely BAD weather... As in - will the hurricano come to our house?

Got'ta love the language of littles!

Teacher Mommy said...

Upon hearing a friend can't make it to a play date because she's sick:

"When she's done sicking, can we play with her?"

Boozy Tooth said...

Priceless as always. Once in complete seriousness my daughter told me about her American History class and learning all about Abra Lincolnham. No lie.

Unknown said...

I've had my 4 year old daughter shout at the top of her lungs: "Mummy tell Daniel (her older brother) to stop sexing me."
He was trying to give her a goodbye kiss.
Doesn't look good at all does it!

That Janie Girl said...

You be hiwarious.

Cora said...

Can I add these to the list?

Shlower: Can I smell that pwetty shlower?

Pwetty: Can I smell that pwetty shlower?

Erf: We live on Erf.

Cwackers: I'd like some cwackers.


I could go on all day....

Jennifer Juniper said...

Must be a local thing, because we get really Ah-sausted around here when we're tired!

drapes = grapes

"I'm gonna versus you!" when they are competing over something.

expecially = especially

Anonymous said...

My students speak mostly in three-letter abbreviations (e.g, OMG! WTF! NFW! L8R!), and say things like "Daag! Mr. D is mad whack, yo?"

I keep a slang dictionary in my desk so I can figure out what they're saying about me.

Anonymous said...

our neighbor's little boy said he loves baseball and his favorite team is the Ballsomore Oreos!


Elaine said...

When my son #2 was in kindergarten he had an assignment to circle all the pictures on the page that began with "S". He circled the sock, the sailboat, the snake, but not the spaghetti. When I asked why he looked at me like I was from Mars and said "Mom, everyone knows basgetti starts with "B"!! He also pronounced his "L" words with a "Y" (always wanted to sit on my "yap". There are just some things that you never want to correct!

Anonymous said...

I love it! My son is outgrowing all that now and I will surely miss it.

KristinFilut said...

The Girl was in gin-nasnics and both of my kids loved sussketti...

I miss those days. I used to get such a laugh out of them!

Kyddryn said...

The Evil Genius likes to tell me he's feeling "whelmed" when things get too much for him.

"Mommy, I need to go be in my room for a few minutes by myself because I'm feeling a little whelmed."

Shade and Sweetwater,

S said...

Once my older came home from preschool telling me that he'd really enjoyed the "blueberry toddler" for dessert at lunch.

Same kid went to "arts and crabs" camp.

S said...

And liked to work on "frogjets" at home.

Brian Miller said...

lol...will load these into my translator for my next trip to school...sometimes it be screamly frustrating not to know what they are saying....smiles.

Unknown said...

Fank you for the big smile this morning!

Tara said...

Awww, back in the good old days when my kids were cute and not nearly as annoying as the teenagers they are now.... My favorite, said with a nice speech imepediment was hippomopomomous :)

The Only Girl said...

My contributions -

Rat Coon - Mom, there's a big rat coon in the back yard!

Liberry - let's go get some more books from the liberry

Thanks for the chuckles!

Tara said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ChiTown Girl said...

OK, I'm going to need to sit down when I have more than 30 seconds, but the first thing that jumped into my head was one of my former babies who always said "shmarshmallows" I'll be back with more!!

Vodka Logic said...

Cute and look page one of your book is done. :)

Mrs. C. said...

And let us not forget the nationa holiday in November, told to me by the K class I subbed in this week:

Kate said...

It's burr-zen out here in the Midwest, you know.

Sue said...

I just scared myself, I knew what they all "meant"! I think that may be because my BFF is my little three year old granddaughter Riley! Take care.

Angie Ledbetter said...

Where can I collect my credits? After three years of teaching early elem. special ed. and one of pre-k through 6th grade Religion, I'm extweemly fruent (and sometimes flatulent). :)

justmakingourway said...

I wish I could think of some of my kids' kindergartenese right now to add to the list. But I am seriously disausted and can't think of a thing!

Heather said...

here's one to add...

petnarian-the place you take your sick pets

mommakin said...

Is it wrong that I still say balentimes?

Spellcheck musta been fun with this one!

Char said...

Ah the voices of the little people. I can still here the little girl speach of my now 45 year old daughter. She couldn't pronounce F's (as in Sish = fish).

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

When Jd was about 5 he renamed cemeteries for me: They are now Bury Gardens. My oldest son called Historical Markers, Hysterical Markers. To this day, which is right at 20 years later, I still use those names! K=0)

LoveAndBooze said...

Aww... This makes me unable to wait to have kids...

Anonymous said...

It is very scary but I hear similar words every day in my house ... but my partner is 32!!

Anonymous said...

I teach French Immersion, where everything gets even more mixed up!

Read in a journal the other day "Mme Smith est un cheval brun."
Which means "Mme Smith is a brown horse". I THINK she meant "Mme Smith a des cheveux bruns." Which means that "Mme Smith has brown hair." Or maybe not. At any rate, better a horse than a cow I say!

Pseudo said...

My son called penguins pengalins every time we went to the zoo.

Daughter called polka dots pokie dots. Everytime she stepped on a bur she would say, "ow mommy a pokie dot got me."

LegalMist said...

My son said "stank you!" instead of "thank you" for years.

It cracked me up every time, plus he said it with such an enthusiastic smile, so I never had the heart to try to correct him.

His kindergarten teacher had her work cut out for her.

Sprite's Keeper said...

Mushally is the only one stumping me...

plainolebob said...

we are lernin, it kinda niques up on ya.
unique... uniqued up on me.

Trac~ said...

LOL - LOVE THEM ALL - TOO SWEET! Thanks for sharing! :o)

the mama bird diaries said...

I'm so jealous that you are bilingual. I've always wanted to know a second language. And this one sounds like a good one to know. :)

Lynn said...

I'm toadawy fwuent.

AiringMyLaundry said...

Yes, my son used to say "fanks!"

SjS said...

One of my students was quite excited because they had purchased "bumpbeds" for her bedroom.

The Rambler said...

I tink I might bomit. :)

Hilarious post. I'm sharing this with my cousin who moved from kindergarten to 2nd grade teaching!!

cheatymoon said...

In my classroom, it's Valentimes day. Also, my 2 year old niece likes to talk about what she is going to to nexterday.

Love this post, VM.

Expat mum said...

Brilliant. And don't you take them to the "Liberry" once a week? Or at least on a "regleyar" basis?

wfbdoglover said...

Mine would say his Tummy was Rumbling (he was hungry)

staskym said...

my 20 yo is going to kill me as is his roommate but the son always wanted panty cakes for breakfast (pancakes)
once we were in restaurant and when the boys were 1&2 the roommate asked for a fork " i need a f*ck I need a f*ck" as loud as he could needless to say the waitress knew exactly what he was saying and rushed right over with a fork.

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Pwactically Pwiceless!

Stacey J. Warner said...

That's it. I've got to start writing down Gooms miss pronunciations because I must share.

much love

Joanie said...

I took Kindergarten for 3 years, so I think I'm fairly fluent.

I also know a few other words:

bemember: Did you bemember that today's my birfday?

birfday: see above

necorize: Hey! I necorize that guy!

crunky: Mom, my throat feels all... crunky today. (great word, I think! all crappy and scratchy and sore and full of gunk)

reputer: Can I play games on the reputer?

Sharon Rose said...

I reNember making Balentimes! I do! I do!

But my sister's fuency far out did mine. My dad used to get her to say big words. Once he asked her to say Milk of Magnesia.

She said, "Milkamagseishure". That was priceless!

Frogs in my formula said...

Love all the throw up references. Too darn cute.

Anne said...

So relieved that I understand my first graders... sometimes, much too clearly...

Said comment from little boy with hand so far up his bum, it may need to be surgically removed, "Teacher, apparently I need some butt cream, I have a rash."

"Uh, yeah, let your mom know that tonight okay? Thanks!"

FranticMommy said...

I love "I'm freeze hot" and "he was sick, so we went to the hossibel" (hospital).
I got my fwuency badge in Kindergartnese and have gradey-ated to Furst Gwader-ese. :)

Mainly a midwife said...

They are adorable, aren't they?
My daughter told me that "A boy named Denber loves her"

(that would be Denver..yes, a boy named Denver..and you tell Denver that Kindergartners are too young for the boyfriend/girlfriend thing, ok?)

Captain Dumbass said...

My sick 4 year old is speaking Kindergartenese with a heavy accent these days.

Christina said...

That's adorable!

It's been years since I worked with children that young, but there are definitely days (today!) when I miss those cute little slip-ups.

Just dropping by from SITS!

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

My ex used to have me read his college students' papers for him when he got stuck. As a Kindergarten teacher I could decipher just about anything! He was always amazed by my fluency! (And dismayed by the spelling and handwriting skills of his students.)

Unknown said...

Thank you for the info. I am sure my son will be speaking this language in a few short years. Hilarious.

Joanna Jenkins said...

"Wunch" was my favorite "subject" in school.

This was a hoot! Thanks.


:: wife mom maniac :: said...

ah shit, had my husband and I giggling like mad, thanks!

KaLynn ("MiMi") said...

I realize I am a TAD late on this comment but one of my grandsons used to call Applebee's AppleCHEES! So now in my mind the name is official! APPLECHEES!

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