5/12/10

Sugar and Spice? Yeah, right.


What do little girls who can't dig for worms at recess do for kicks?



They put snails up their noses.



And if they're REALLY lucky, one will get stuck in someone's adorable little nostril. And if they are even LUCKIER, the only girl in the class who can't speak English is elected to go and try to tell the teacher - using hand motions and a modified version of Chinese and English.

This works out well for the snail sniffing lass, however, because in the length of time it took to shock the teacher into action, the nose had sufficiently "run" enough to expel said snail.




Some lessons are best learned with no assistance.



40 comments:

WeaselMomma said...

Priceless!!!!!!!

The Boob Nazi said...

Ewwww. I am horrified.

middleagedcrazywoman said...

OMG! THAT is hysterical!! You gotta love it when kids make you laugh on a slow wednesday!

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

You've snot to be kidding me!

SkylersDad said...

Amazing. Even in my youth, I have never had the desire to shove something up my nose. Lot's of other bad habits, but no projectiles in the nose!

Ellie said...

Urrrgh.

The Broad said...

Absolutely sufficiently grossed out !
I can handle slimy things but never had the urge to stick anything in my nose .. nothing slimy anyway..lol

And I'm snot joking !

Gigi said...

OH. MY. HELL!!!! Seriously???

I can only imagine how that note to the parents went.....but wait, since it "expelled" itself I would guess no note was necessary.....

Again, another reason I could never be a teacher. I bow to you.

Melissa B. said...

How would one pry a snail out of wee one's nose? I think the Snot Extraction Method is the way to goQ!

Missy said...

A live snail? I would faint! When I was younger, I put a bean up my nose and had to go to the ER! I was one of those children! LOL

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

Oh, my! You know, there's a hidden message in here for all of us! Sometimes, you just have to stand back, remain calm, and let the snails work their way out!

Glad everything's OK!!

just making my way said...

Um...I think you should go back to letting them dig for worms.

Wild Child said...

Perhaps she was just conforming to this poem from my favorite childhood poet, Shel Silverstein:

WARNING

Inside everybody's nose
There lives a sharp-toothed snail.
So if you stick your finger in,
He may bite off your nail.
Stick it farther up inside,
And he may bite your ring off.
Stick it all the way, and he
May bite the whole darn thing off.

Brian Miller said...

oh my...my sister got a magnetic ear ring stuck up her nose at school once...

Lorraine said...

Ha! So you've got some snail-sniffing kindergarteners out there in Oregon! It must have been the new moon.

Snappy Di said...

Lawd have mercy! Hope you sent a note home with the lass to the parents. She's obviously been watching too many gardening shows.

DI

MJS said...

I adore these girls. When they win a Nobel Prize in biochemistry you can say you knew them when they were getting snails stuck up their noses on the playground.

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Mellodee said...

A snail. In her nose. Must have been a small snail. Or a big nose!


LOL!! Kids!

Alix said...

That's when the advice to sit back and blow is most handy. Just sayin'.

Steven Anthony said...

I stuck a bean up my nose once...lol

GraceesMommy said...

eewwwhheee!! i just hope that the said snails never make it to my yummy serving of escargot that i enjoy every once in a blue moon.

CSY said...

One of my brothers got a tiny sweet tart stuck in his nose once. Being the wonderful big sister that I am, I NEVER let him forget it! Now I just have to remember which one it was! Little kids are AWESOME!! Its when they're teenagers they start being brats!

Magpie said...

Ack!
I had to take my kid to the ER once because she stuffed a mint leaf up her nose.

Bano said...

Ha! Too funny!

Joanna Jenkins said...

That is nasty! I bet the little lass doesn't do THAT again.... at least I hope not.
jj

Joanie M said...

Oh yuck! but still LMAO!!!!

Lisa said...

In your line of work, every day is different that's for sure.

CatLadyLarew said...

Yeah... just another typical day on the playground!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

A whole new meaning to escargot.

The Queen said...

I stopped by for a drink.. but holy cow.. your bar has grown and is so full.. I can't wait.. I need a drink... and I would settle for vodka.. but I prefer gin..

only a movie said...

Wow.

LoveFeast Table said...

Disgusto-rama! I could see this becoming a whole new "foodie fad"...runny escargot!
Thanks for stopping by our table!
It was nice to have you!
~kristin and chris ann

The Empress said...

You just deal with it,though, don't you?

And then run home and post about it.

As Cape Cod Turns said...

Now I am sufficiently grossed out too. Yuck!

Anonymous said...

I feel sorry for the poor snail. Can you imagine how scared that poor creature must have been?

Anonymous said...

No snails(my brother would collect them and put them in bed with me after I went to sleep. I'm sure Ma needed a LOT of valium for the screams that ensued.)

I grew up in the 70's and have to admit to putting a glass bead up my nose. (Remember the glass bead curtains?) My sister was babysitting and I thought she was going to lose her mind. Hee hee.

She called Mom(A nurse)and she rushed from work, had these long tweezers, and rolled her eyes at me. When she took out the bead she spanked me and sent me to my room :)

Years later came my nephews. Karma is truly evil. My nephews terrified me OFTEN with snail and nose situations.

They have creative minds the likes of which I have never seen. I feel your pain. (I was also a preschool teacher in another lifetime so...yep.)

Lol...ugh..snails...

Cora said...

Pfffft! Kids never change. I knew a boy who ate a slug. Just picked it up off the ground and ate it. Blah.

tulpen said...

kids are so gross. remind me never to have kids. crap. too late.

Patrick said...

Wild Child beat me to it!! Good one VodkaMom. Keep at it.