I get by with a LOT of help from my friends...

I have been feeling better and better each day, thanks in NO small part to all of you. (Crap, you already know that, right?)

I have made a great new friend as of late, and her name is Lynn. She has made me laugh, has listened to me rant, and has kicked me in the *@@ when I needed it.

She also offered a guest post, which I am SO thankful for! And so, while I sit here in front of a fire and smile as my heart mends, I give you her offering. It made me smile- and I hope it does the same for you.

In which I discuss the gift of the magi

Both my girls had to read “The Gift of the Magi” for school and then write a paper on it. Because Keely and Andie are only 15 months apart, each year Andie ended up doing the exact same assignments that Keely had just done the previous year.

Although, this is often a mixed blessing, in some ways it can be loads of fun. This is one of the fun times.
 Andie had to read “The Gift of the Magi” for school and then write an essay on the character Jim who was Della’s husband. For those of you who haven’t read the story, it is a famous Christmas story by O’Henry and it goes like this: Jim and Della were quite poor but deeply in love. Della, who only has $1.87 wants to get her husband Jim a present. They both treasure two items that they own: Della’s hair and Jim’s gold watch. So basically the rest of the story unfolds as Della sells her hair to get a chain for Jims watch, and he, of course, sells his watch to buy her combs for her hair. The moral of the story is it’s better to give then to receive, but as Keely pointed out, both the characters of the story ended up screwed at the end so what’s the point?
At any rate, Andie was writing her essay and she asked Keely and myself to come up with a “title” to the essay. In yet another great example of “awesome parenting moments,” we came up with some terrific ideas. Here were the finalists:

1. Did you get a haircut?

2. Quit yankin’ my chain!

3. Slim Jim

4. The Crummy Christmas

5. Do you know the time?

By the time we finished yelling out all the possibilities, the three of us were cracking up and Andie was disgusted. Laughing, but still disgusted.

So, if you ever need any parenting help, I suggest you contact me immediately. I’m also available for birthday parties and bar mitzvahs.
 I’m just saying…

(visit my friend Sharon., if you have a moment, who is taking a new path.)


Smart Mouth Broad said...

Good parenting is so hard to find. Bravo!

Hugs to VodkaMom!

Sandee said...


You are going to be just fine honey. I can tell. It just takes some time. You'll see.

Have a terrific day. Big hug. :)

SherilinR said...

my parents made us read that book every single christmas eve of my life & i swear, every time, i wonder - what is the value in this lesson? i mean, better to give, better to think of others, but common! now they have nothing left & just a bad haircut.
personally, i vote for #2. quit yankin my chain!
yay for unconventional parenting!

Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit said...

Wonderful guest post :) Had me smiling.
I have just sat here and read about a months worth of Vodkamom posts. Yeah, I'm a bit behind. But its summer here in the land of Aus and I've been hanging out on the beach a lot. Today I had hoped to "lay" on my hands and knees with my bum in the air so the sun could do something about my tan bananas under my saggy butt cheeks, but it's raining. So I am spending my time catching up on all things bloggy. I was a bit sad that you've been so sad. That life is having you start parts of it again. Hope you are in a happy place Vodkamom. You deserve it :)

Anonymous said...

Oh, I thought this story was a warning about poor communication skills. Like the "giving tree" is a warning not to give everything away, or you will die alone and unwatered.

shrink on the couch said...

The Crummy Christmas is my vote -- hahaha! Because, truly? These were my exact thoughts when I read it.

Another title, inspired by many years of marriage:

Ask Before You Buy

That Janie Girl said...

That is awesome!

Love you, heifer!

Sharon Rose said...

This reminds me of the first year I had a part time job, still in high school and it was Christmas.

Wanting to make sure I bought my parents something for Christmas, I spent a LARGE amount of 16 yr. old time trying to decide the best gift for Mom and Daddy.

Since Daddy loved eagles and drank coffee "religiously", I bought him a set of 4 coffee mugs, which we still have. HE LOVED THEM!

Mom didn't have any gloves. So, I went searching for just the right pair. I found them! Only I had to search really hard to find her size. Finally, after taking every pair (there were 1,000 it felt like), I found 1 pair her size.

I got home, wrapped them very pretty and on Christmas day, they opened their gifts together. Daddy was oohing and ahhing over his mugs. Mom was sitting there trying to be sooo kind and not saying much. Finally I caught onto what was happening! The left glove was defected. All the fingers had been sewn shut!

THAT was a crummy Christmas to me! She was just happy I made the effort I think. I've never forgotten that.

Anonymous said...

Vodkamom? you inspire me....(and No, not just ny your title!!!) I LOVE your writing and your daily musings encourage me to be a better me! thanks for sharing! And enduring!

Vodka Logic said...

Great post..

Might I suggest
"Nest time save the $1.87 for food"

Brian Miller said...

ha. nice guest post....will think of you for the next birthday party we have...smiles.

hope you are well VM...

Unknown said...

I never understood the ending to be lovely...

Christmas FAIL

Notes From ABroad said...

LOL, love this blog, hated that story.
< How I Came To Hate Christmas> would have been my title.

The Sisters' Hood said...

Hi there, first time over here since i followed my good friend Lynn over :)
Congrats on the guest post and thank you for introducing me to another great blogger.

unmitigated me said...

How about "My Hair Will Grow Back, But Your Watch is Gone Forever"?

Formerly known as Frau said...

Love it! You are certainly due Mother of the year in my book!

duffylou said...

Love that you can be spontaneous with your kids. For the record, I like, Quit Yankin' My Chain.

Kimberly said...

How 'bout one more:

Think it's Time for a Haircut?

網頁設計 said...

hooray, your writings on theater and writing much missed!