Well, it appears that I have to find a lot of money in a very little amount of time. There are several reasons for this, and none of them have to do with good overcoming evil. (If I thought for ONE MINUTE that this money was going to the person who it's really intended for, I wouldn't blink for a minute. Well, I might still cry my eyes out, but I wouldn't blink. No blinking.)
However, I have often felt that I am an extremely resourceful person when the case warrants it. And this time, it really, really does.
So, in the spirit of all that is crazy, unpredictable and painful, I have decided to try to sell as many things as I can to help with the large sum that I have been asked to pay someone who shall remain unnamed.
Now, because you are all my faithful readers, friends, relatives, listeners, supporters and advisors, I thought I'd either give you FIRST DIBS on what is going on the market at the huge yard sale/craigslist extravaganza this weekend, or perhaps you could advise me about how much I should allow these precious heirlooms go for. After all, it's only stuff. (Sure, most of it all belonged to my dearly departed loving parents, but it's only stuff. And perhaps this is what it was intended for all along.)
Oh sure, I was never given anything of any value for birthdays or Christmases these last 22 years, but I am incredibly grateful for these amazing children that I love with all my heart. I can't get a nickel for them myself, but that's another post entirely and it's best saved for the future. (Say in about 17.5 months.)
After retrieving most of our belongings over the weekend, I started opening many dust-covered boxes that had been tucked in an attic for many years. I stumbled across some items that I'm hoping might help get me out of this tight situation. (And when I say tight, I mean car dying, unexpected taxes owed, Sassy's additional car repairs, Sassy's missing school loan, and two tow truck bills tight...) Let me know what you think.
First, I have a wide variety of comic books that I discovered my mother hadn't sold AFTER ALL. (I was convinced she sold all that I owned after I graduated from college. At least she CLAIMED she had. Apparently I was wrong.)
Second, I found these old Life magazines- in amazing condition. Marilyn, Robert, Ted and Joan and Christina Ford all appear on the various covers. (Does someone want to offer me $2,550.00 for the lot? Anyone??)
Then, I have the box of 45's that my sister and I played so often that I can't believe they're still intact. The box, however, isn't. (For those of you infants, they are called RECORDS and we played them on a box that had a circle thingy that would spin with a needle that would READ the music and play it!! Cheezus, that sounded complicated.)
Now, if none of those items interest you, I have a set of wedding rings that I'm pretty sure I paid for MYSELF out of the small inheritance I received after my mother died. (The remainder of which I used to pay for the wedding, reception, his ring and too many things to mention. Don't say it. I offered, so please don't say it.) I'll throw in the wedding gown, veil, puffy slip and shoes. Oh sure, they're 22 years old and slightly used, but they might make a nifty Halloween costume. (Size 6).
Okay, I'm opening bids at $1,000,000. Or one dollar. What say you?
(And if you an spot Munchie among the animals that the girls are selling, you win the free set of Tupperware. There are no LIDS, but you already knew that, didn't you??)