1. Bair. “Dat’s not bair!”
2. Mishta. “Hasta la mishta, Mrs. Smythe!”
3. Peanuts a tenshun. “Mrs. Smythe, what did you say? I wasn’t peanuts a tenshun.” (No one listens to me. NO ONE.)
4. Crap. “Da kids went to Miss B’s room? Crap!” This is what the ESL child will say when she realizes that all the ESL children went to ESL without her. (Cause she wasn’t peanuts a tenshun.)
Crap? CRAP? I smell a rat: a tiny, adorable Chinese rat.
Note to the ESL teacher: When they can say curse words appropriately, I think they’ve tested OUT of ESL. Don’t you?