"What I did on my spring break." (Two days isn’t TECHNICALLY a spring break. It was more like a, um, a spring two minute time-out, so to speak.)
On the first day of Spring Break I was recovering from having my @$$ kicked by an incredibly smart and active class of first graders who apparently found the chink in my armor and KILLED me with an arrow straight through my patience on Friday. I tried to give myself mouth to mouth, since I am now alone again and have to fend for myself, but it didn’t work out so well. Oh sure, I’m alive, but it took several thousand ounces of, um, tea and a few days to recover from THAT.
Second, apparently the power company inadvertently charged me an inordinate amount of money on my power bill, which was electronically debited from my account because I’m trying to be responsible and have all my bills paid on the proper DUE DATE. I might have been sobbing uncontrollably on the phone to an incredibly wonderful operator at East Penn Power. After a long drawn out conversation and investigation, the problem was fixed and my account was credited that amount; or at least it will be. SOON.
Then? Wasn’t I surprised when on MONDAY my kind Credit Union called to say that the IRS had FROZEN ALL my accounts due to unpaid taxes for a certain year. Apparently they wanted four THOUSAND dollars. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Imagine my SHOCK and surprise, as I have spent the last two and half years trying my best to fix all that has been broken, and pay each and every bill that has come my way. I have collected cans, taken clothes to the consignment shop, sold just about everything that has any value on Craigslist, and done everything in my power to right a sinking ship.
I spent a good amount of time on the phone with an INCREDIBLY wonderful IRS agent (I know. I KNOW! They DO exist!) who ignored my sobbing and spoke to me in a kind and incredible way. Ultimately, he faxed the bank to take care of the freeze, outlined for me exactly what needed to happen, and sent me on my way. Sure, my eyes were swollen shut from, oh, a few tears, but I was so thankful for his help.
Lastly, I’ve spent three hours with a brilliant accountant at H&R Block who is incredibly thankful that she won’t have to see me for another 365 days. She kicked @$$, and sent me home to enjoy the last night of spring break on my couch, with a few less worries.
Now, if someone can tell me why life has to kick my ass every SINGLE day, I would be more than happy to listen. In the meantime, pass the vodka. I need a @)#(*!&!^#^ drink.