Al Gore can invent the internet but NOT a way to stop Father Time? Life is so unfair. (aka The Golden Boy is 16.)

Sixteen years ago I was recovering from my third c-section and the joy of welcoming a son into the world.

The only two things I remember from the operating room were my SISTER’S shouts of “IT’S A BOY! IT’S A BOY!  IT’S A BOY!” and me thinking that the doctor sounded shockingly like my sister who had been BANNED from the operating room because only one family member was allowed to be present and typically it was the FATHER of the baby.

He’s brought me 16 years of incredible joy, laughter and heartache, and I’m hoping that there will only be many, many more years of the same.

He’s the boy who poured three cans of his father’s car oil into his plastic Tonka Tractor in the middle of the driveway.  He removed all of outlet covers in the house with a screwdriver when he was four, and the fact that he didn’t electrocute himself is still a mystery to me.  That was also the year he managed to unbolt the toilet from floor in the basement bathroom and created an indoor pool.  He loved stealing and wearing Bitchy’s two-piece bathing suit that summer, and could outrun her every SINGLE time she chased him all over the yard screaming at the top of her lungs.  (Jesus I still laugh about that.)

I took him to the ER for stitches in his knees so many times that the nurses knew him (and ME) by name.  He finally ran out of places for them to stitch, but fortunately they had plenty of fake skin on hand. 

He asked me to read to him every single night, and cuddle each and every night before he could fall asleep.  We trick-or treated every year, threw the football, frisbee and baseball every single day each summer, and played basketball more times than I can mention.  I've received candles, flowers, hand written cards, notes and declarations of love AND hate over these 16 years.  :-)

And so, to the boy who (along with his three young friends) sang a ROUSING rendition of D*ck in a Box to his mother when she drove them home from the pool one sunny summer afternoon, I wish you a most amazing happy and joyous birthday.

I can’t wait until your wedding  (in the FAR distant future) when I play that very song BACK to you and your bride.  I’m sure she’ll love it JUST as much as I did.