She wasn't so Scary.

I am shook.  I am speechless. I am sad, shocked, heartbroken and damn right shook.  I am writing his note on my blog, because this is where I met Scary Mommy.

Jill Smokler passed away this morning, according to her Facebook Page and Instagram page.  While many of us had a feeling this was coming, the fact that is really DID is still staggering.  She was one of us. Truly. 

I first met Jill online way back in the early days of blogging. I started Vodkamom when my writing needed a place to take seed and grow.  She was one of a group of women (and men) who helped to water those seeds.  

There was a group of us who would go from one blog to another leaving snarky comments and funny anecdotes on each other’s blogs. To me, she was one of the gang, and it wasn’t until my first blogging conference that I realized that she was kindof a big deal. (To put it mildly.)   

I met her along with a group of other amazing women, and we all just hung out together. We would sit at tables together at the various sessions, go to lunch together and then meet up at various evening events. She was one of the girls who was so easy to talk to, to laugh with and to share stories with. She was one of us. 

I will always remember her kindness. 

I will always remember that she took the time to visit my blog and leave comments. 

I will always remember that she answered all of my emails, even the ones sent late at night after several martinis. 

I will always remember that she made sure I was included when we were at conferences together. 

Shit. 

This life is a crazy, unexpected and often painful ride.  The highs are very high, and the lows are heartbreaking.  But as we all know, in the end, “we are all just walking each other home”.   

Not sure why some have to go home way too early…