I don’t remember many details following her death, and I’m convinced I suffered from some sort of breakdown. I can’t speak for my sister or brother, but I moved through many years in a bit of a haze.
I did make several life-changing choices during that period of sadness. The first, I quit law school in the middle of my second year and went back to school for my teaching certificate. Secondly, I left a five year marriage that was laden with drug use and heavy partying. I feel these were two incredibly good decisions, made under the influence of grief. (Some things become abundantly clear during those days…)
I moved through the years painfully, feeling a bit lost and disillusioned. Strangely, I am feeling that way again these days, and I am struggling like a wounded soul trying to keep my head above these rising waters of sadness.
I want to thank you all for throwing me all your lifelines. Can you see me valiantly trying to grab a hold of one?
I will continue reaching, safe in the knowledge that at least one of those damn things will hit me on the head and wake me up.
(thank you, my friends, thank you……i may continue to post old funnies, forgive me...)