The Boston Marathon? Phhhhht. Spend a day kindergarten.

I made the mistake of trying to chat with the class after lunch and BEFORE recess. When you have a class of 16 boys and the nine girls, you need to be sure to get outside as often as possible!

This was the turn of events:

“Boys and girls, this week there is an important day coming up, almost like a holiday. Can you tell me what it is?”

“I KNOW!! It’s my nana’s birfday!”

“Well, that’s close, but it’s another day that has SOMETHING to do with what we live on,” I said, as I made the shape of a large circle in the air with my finger.

“Da ERF!!! It’s ERF day!!!”

“That’s right, Jason. It’s going to be Earth Day on Thursday. Can someone tell me what that means?” A billion hands shot up, and I called on Julie.

“Sally hit me.”

“Um, she’s sitting ALL the way over there. How could she do that?”

“Well, it was at lunch.”

“We’ll talk about that on the bench during recess. Okay? Me, you and Sally- meeting on the bench; now, what’s Earth day people?”

James, “It’s when we fank de erf.”

Brian, “It’s saving the earth from dying. Cause we don’t know WHEN it’s gonna die, but we are gonna try to save it from dying.”

Jessica, “Yeah, we can’t repair it, we have to save it.”

John: “Can I take my coat off?”

“John, yes. Now, can anyone remember what we were talking about?”

Michael, “No, but I wanted to get a drink. Can I get a drink?”

“Yes, okay, now who else can tell me----wait. WAIT. Did I tell EVERYONE to go get a drink? Sit back down people - you, too, Michael. Okay, what can we do for Earth Day??”

Jack: “I know! We can not do litter and save our plastic milk bottles. Like we do right now!”

“Paige, what do you want to say?”

“You told us yesterday that you didn’t want to see anymore fingers in our noses and Toby won’t stop picking his nose.”

“Toby, fingers down; Anna, what did you want to say?”

“Did you exercise Mrs Smythe? Cause you look different today!”

“Okay, class. Guess what? Anna- you would get an automatic A if I gave grades, because yes I have been exercising and haven’t worn these jeans for two years. And on another note, we are going to continue this discussion tomorrow, because I am officially throwing in the towel!”

“A towel? What does THAT mean?”

Me, “That means LINE UP!”

And then, the craziness really began as they ran screaming to the door.

Yep. That was about a five-minute window into my day. Best job ever?

You better believe it.

Now, someone hand me the remote. I'm disausted.


Carrieann said...

You know, when I'm really tired, I find myself using the word "disausted." Thanks to you!

cheatymoon said...

I love when they raise their hands as if they are into your discussion and it's to go to the bathroom or tattle. Cute post, VM. xoxo

Mr. Halpern said...

Ah, I love me some kindergarten. Da ERF is such an awesome thang to celebrate. :)

Gigi said...

All I can say is teachers (especially kindergarten teachers) rock! Because I know I couldn't do it!

Anonymous said...

I would make a horrible teacher because I would be busting a gutt, falling on the floor, laughing all day long. You crack me up with your stories.

The Blue Ridge Gal

Anonymous said...

our erf is beautiful;)

5 Kids With Disabilities said...

Wow! I didn't know it was Erf Day! I learned something from your class!!

Boozy Tooth said...

No thanks. I'd rather do the Boston Marathon on hands and knees.

You deserve a medal.

PS: How's that no vodka thing working out for ya?

PPS: Word verification: "angst." I kid you not.

Kate Hanley said...

I was exhausted just reading this post. I don't know how you have the energy!

ChiTown Girl said...

I don't think "outsiders' have the slightest clue what our day is like. You do such an awesome job of giving them a peek at our world. :)

Mellodee said...

Actually I'm impressed that you got so many kids who knew what it is and seem to understand the concept (at least a bit). The other questions and stuff they wanted to share are just part of your daily laugh quota! :)

Lori P said...

geez, now I'm worn out.

Jen said...

I can picture exactly how that all went down :) I don't know how you do it every day!

Merrily Down the Stream said...

Oh gawd - that's absolutely fabulous!

Brian Miller said...

see...i love anna already...and obviously the little boy did not get enough nourishment from lunch...just supplementing it with some of that mucus protein you know...

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a great day for a great teacher (with WAAAAAY more patience than I have).

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Yes, another typical day in Kindergarten. So many questions... so little focus!

CiCi said...

I am disausted just reading about it. Kids especially so many of them can be disausting, huh.

Anna Whiston-Donaldson said...

disausted is right! bless your heart!

i once knocked on my neighbors' door to tell them my sister picked her boogers and ate them. nice.

Alexandra said...

I LOVES your classroom stories. I love "she hit me." No she didn't. "Yes, she did, it was at lunch."

I love them.

Holly Lefevre said...

The thing about Kindergarten, after all of their questions and requests...in Kindergarten they are still darn cute!

Thanks for stopping by on my SITS Day.

504 Main

mo.stoneskin said...

The primary way we can save our planet is to stop picking our noses. For me, it's too much of a sacrifice.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

Teacher! My husband won't stop picking his nose, so if you can figure out how to stop kids from doing it, please let me know.

WeaselMomma said...

Disausted is right!

Is this how conversations at home go, too?

Cheryl said...

What a wonderful day you had Mrs. Smythe!

This reminded me of when our little guy used to refer to the dinosaurs as exhausted. Amen.

As Cape Cod Turns said...

You should have gotten an honorary Boston Marathon medal for your 5 minutes....

Keyona said...

I need a nap after reading that...wheew.

slow panic said...

this is what i think -- there is heaven. and then there is a place nine million times better where kindergarten teachers will go. 'cuz they totally deserve it.

Rima said...

Hey, thanks for the reminder! I'll be FANKIN' THE ERF on Thursday!

The Only Girl said...

I read you every day but rarely comment. But I do have to say that I LOVE these stories. My youngest is in grade 1, so these stories are all too familiar. Keep them coming!

An Open Heart said...

I TOTALLY love the word "disausted" and have stolen it for my personal vocabulary! God Bless Kindergarteners!


Mike said...

LOL. Anna is going to go far in life I see. Or at least get out of trouble quite often.

Anonymous said...

I love little kids, but I wouldn't wanna teach them all day, for that I want the biggers. I love the glimpses into your day though.

Adrienne said...

Whew! What's on the lesson plan for today?

I don't know how on erf you do it.

justmakingourway said...

I hear you on the disausted thing. And I haven't exercised in three days. Not good.

Suzy said...

***now, what’s Earth day people?***

I see you upgraded them from kids to people. You ARE tired.

Lauren said...

That's awesome! Out of the mouths of babes!

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha. I love it! They're adorable! Sometimes I wonder what on earth would possess me to go to school for Secondary Education instead of Elementary. Such sweeties.

Carolyn...Online said...

Why would anyone in their right mind run a marathon? Wait... I don't think that was the point.

Bethany said...

I love how everything you write on here I can completely relate to! The circle times we have at my school are pretty much exactly ethe same! :)

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