9/4/10

Sometimes THEY know what's best for them.



I’ve spent the last four Septembers driving through every small town in this very mountainous state of Oregon, to watch Sassy develop into a decent field hockey player. Before that, I spent two springs doing the same.

As Sassy approached her senior year in high school, we were not aggressive about touting Sassy’s talents to every Division One Team in the nation because frankly, it costs a pretty penny to get your child noticed.

Tightwad and I both believe that an athlete’s talent ought to speak for itself, but the reality is this; you have to be seen at every college camp, at Festivals held in California and Florida, play for every and any team within a five thousand mile radius, and send your films and endless begging emails to any coaches or teams that MIGHT have a spot for you.

We are among many other families in this country that just do not have the money for this kind of advertising. So, in the end, you not only have to have natural god-given talent, you also have to have some wealthy family members to help you along the way.

I hate that *@&^.

Fortunately for Sassy, there WERE some D-1 teams that expressed interest in her, even if she DID have crappy parents. For a while we expected her to attend a smaller D-1 school that was fairly close to home.


Then the calls started.


They were from a D-3 coach who was extremely interested in Sassy, and she would not give up. She called her weekly, kept up on her games and her accomplishments, and made her feel important.


It was after the season ended that Sassy informed me that she wanted to visit this particular coach, her university, and see what she had to offer.


I laughed it off at first. “What??” I said. “But that’s NOT a D-1 school! Surely you are kidding.”


“Mom. It’s JUST a visit.”

And so we went. It was her life, her path and she needed to be informed so that she could make a decision that was best for her.


We went on a Friday and I dropped her off with a group of girls I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW. I drove to my hotel thinking that this was probably the craziest thing I had ever done.


We left the following afternoon.


“That’s it. THAT is where I want to go to school. Those are the girls I want to play with, and that is the coach that I want to play for.”

I tried to keep my mouth shut. It didn’t work.

“But it’s NOT A D-1 SCHOOL! You are so talented! Your coach said…”

“Mom, stop. Listen to me. Why do I want to go to a school where I have to fight and kiss up to people on the SLIGHT CHANCE that I MIGHT play when I’m a senior? WHY? I want to play now. I want to play with a team that plays as a team- not where people are only playing for themselves.”

I digested this on the long ride home.


She was right.


Last night she called me after her first college game.


“Mom! WE WON 5-1!! And guess what? I started. I played MOST of the game! I came out by mistake and when coach realized I was out she sent me back in!”


I was so proud, and couldn’t really talk for a minute.


But then, she continued, “Mom, this is what I’ve worked so hard for all these years. THIS. I feel like it has all paid off.”


And with that, I knew that she was right where she was supposed to be.

38 comments:

Cheryl said...

Damn near had me crying. Ah hell, I did. She done good with her choice and her game.

Anonymous said...

I was almost crying too!

Sara Padrusch said...

This post is wonderful. You taught that girl right, even if you didn't realize it at the time.

xoxo
Sara
www.shinyredhouses.blogspot.com

Brian Miller said...

nice. sounds like she has the right attitude...cant wait to hear how she does!

ChiTown Girl said...

Wow, she must have been raised by one hell of an awesome mom to be that brilliant!! ;-)

It's nice to hear how happy she is with her choice. Good job, Sassy!

Suzy said...

So I'm guessing D1 is good and D3 is not as good? But D3 lets you play?

All I know about sports is that O.J. was guilty.

Mellodee said...

There comes a point in your children's lives, when you just have to bite your tongue, cross your fingers, and let them fly! And then when they fly to the exact right stop in their journey, all we mom's can do is shake our heads in amazement that this adult woman is the same person that wanted to jump off the roof when she was 4! :)

Captain Dumbass said...

I think you need something on your sidebar to keep us updated on her games.

Suburban Correspondent said...

That is so cool!

Gigi said...

I know even less about field hockey than I do about the football that my son plays - but this made me tear up. The crazy things we do for those darn kids - and sometimes it works out!

Jill said...

You just brought me to tears. I needed it...

Liss said...

Ah, I learn so much from you, and of course, Sassy in this case.

Lovely post xxx

BLOGitse said...

You're both smart. Your daughter knows what she wants and lives in a moment - not tomorrow (or in her dreams) and she's active.
You're a smart mother. You listen. And let her do what's better for her.
Good balance.
You woman rock! :)

Mandi said...

Beautiful. And you made me teary.

Just Margaret said...

That is awesome! Good for her for following her gut, and an extra "Yay!" on their first win of the season.

Ya done good, Mom!

Lisa Russell said...

How wonderful -- sometimes we just need to listen to our kids, don't we? This taught me a lot. Congrats to her on a good game and a good start to a great year!

SkylersDad said...

This brought tears to my eyes. You have done so well, and congrats to Sassy!

a Broad said...

This is lovely .. I needed to cry, first thing in the morning... but I am smiling too.
Congratulations to Sassy and to her parents who did Something Right :)
un beso .. C

Kathryn Magendie said...

You don't know how you just created the perfect metaphor/analogy for the decision I made to go with a small press publisher rather than trying to for for one of the Big Guys - *big fat smiling here*

idgtm said...

I have a daughter in soccer for the past 1,000 years. It's cost me $1,000,000,000. in club fees, hotels, etc.

Hopeing she'll get noticed, because we're really bad parents, too and unfortunately, we have the wrong last name. Darn!

idgtm said...

Forgot to add, congrats to you and Sassy. The cream always rises to the top. :)

anymommy said...

This makes my heart happy. A huge congrats to Sassy, it sounds like it's going to be an amazing year.

Angie Ledbetter said...

Bravo to the brilliant coach (and mom) who saw her potential and had enough sense to let her be where she could really bloom! yay!

Angie Ledbetter said...

PeeEss....I've been thinking about you lately, and consequently, sending prayer power. :) Huggage

Shannon Tucker Photography said...

Bravo Sassy! Well done, Mom.

Losing Brownies said...

Gosh, you've got a smart cookie there! I'm so glad she's doing what she loves to do and is enjoying it all the while!

Missy said...

That is so great! Sometimes they do know best! Sometimes...

The Empress said...

Yeah, how did she know, though???

SHe was so dang right. Sassy, how did you know????

justmakingourway said...

Congratulations to Sassy and her team. I really hope my daughter will speak her mind in that way when she is that age. And I hope I listen as well as you did.

jessica said...

crying in NY too. wow.

Lisa said...

I am so happy for Sassy! And for you. It's a parenting WIN.

No Time Newlywed said...

just gave me goosebumps. a good mom makes a kid a good decision maker. that's the true test. way to go vodka mom!

Donna said...

That's awesome! I'm so glad for her to get to live her dream.

JulieBouf said...

Congrats to Sassy. I just hope Katie gives in and learns how to read so she can GO to college someday (She currently is adament that she will never learn to read).

Have a great time Saturday being all "Sideline Mommy". I'll think of you and think fondly about would could have been....(PS. There's always Sat night...)

Kate said...

Yes. They do. Isn't it awesome? She'll have four years of this kind of excitement! And someday, some girl is going to tell HER mother that she wants to play for this team because she met SASSY!

Heidi said...

That's an awesome feeling - for you AND Sassy. This post gave me warm fuzzies...and the hope that we all end up where we belong.

B said...

Sometimes things really do work out the way they are supposed to.

As Cape Cod Turns said...

YAY FOR SASSY!!!! Awesome!!!!