Fingers of Gold. (aka How do YOU spell relief? I spell it J-A-C-K.)

I graduated from a small high school in a valley in, um, Oregon.  We had about 200 in our graduating class (give or take) and I can say with a tad bit of certainty that I knew each person by name.  (They didn’t vote me the most outgoing for nothing.  However, that and two bits still won’t get you on the homecoming court.  Dang it.)

Through the amazing miracle called Facebook, I have been able to reconnect with many of these friends, and then some.  It’s like a cool cocktail party each night on my dining room table, and I don’t even have to take a shower or wear a cute party dress.

I’ve recently reconnected with an old friend we’ll call Jack.  He was a great guy, one who always had a smile, an amazing laugh and was an important member of the offensive line on our football team.  He went on to become a successful physical therapist/chiropractor/miracle man who just happened to relocate back home and has an office in the old hometown.

How convenient.

As you may recall, my many years of competitive gymnastics have taken many a toll on this still fairly YOUNG body (cough).  Oh sure, over the last two years I’ve managed to lose almost 30 pounds thanks to yoga, hiking, divorce trauma and the fear that someone at SOME point might see me naked.  (That particular kind of fear is a miracle diet pill.  Trust me.)  

However, this crazy body is still hurting.  I’ve had carpal tunnel surgeries, a torn meniscus, knee surgery, physical therapy and more shin/knee issues.  I’ve spent a lot of time these last several weeks undergoing crazy sonograms of my legs/veins/groin and other areas too ticklish to mention.  Nada. 

“You might want to try physical therapy to help with your groin and shin issues,” said the young, handsome doctor who apparently didn’t know me very well.

“Listen,” I said, “I’ve been doing every form of exercise under the SUN, and some others I won’t mention here, and I don’t think that’s the answer.  But thanks, I’ll think about it and I’ll get back to you."

And as I left I thought of Jack.

It festered around my brain for a bit, and that night I sent him a message on Facebook.  He was, after all, a very successful physical therapist of some kind.  I think I said something about a pain in my groin, and wondered if he could help me.   He replied quickly and said yes, he would love to and asked where we should meet.  I told him to come on over to my house.  He responded quickly that the plan sounded great, and I’d see him when I got back from vacation.

And then I realized what I’d said.   

What kind of crazy stalker was I?  A pulled groin?  A massage at my house?  In my LIVING ROOM?  Oh sweet Jesus.

I emailed him.  I tried clumsily to explain, and crossed my fingers.

Last night he showed up.  He called me from the driveway after I had just unpacked from my trip, and I ran out the front door.  His six foot four inch frame exited the truck and walked to the back of his truck and he lifted out his table. 

After an incredible REAL LIVE massage using a technique called “Myofacial Release” my body felt better than it has in years; years!  I was able to walk without the pain in areas that hadn’t been pain free in years.  He showed me exercises, scheduled several more times to come over, and explained exactly what had been happening to my body.  It was amazing.

And he never ONCE mentioned my clumsy, hysterical first effort to get him into my living room to massage my groin.

Thank God.


ChiTown Girl said...

I'm so glad he was able to provide some sweet relief. And a massage, too ;-)

Utah L said...

House calls ?

Sara J. Henry said...

Dear God, you found someone who can do myofascial trigger point therapy IN YOUR HOME?!?!? I haven't found anyone to do it since I left Chicago. CAN I COME VISIT AGAIN?!? Or would he like to come visit Vermont? I can supply a week's free stay in a vacation home.

Brian Miller said...

hey it worked didnt it...smiles...

SkylersDad said...

Ah yes. The old "come over and massage my groin in my living room" gambit!

You would be surprised how often that doesn't work when coming from a guy...

But seriously, I am glad you found some relief. I go ever two weeks to the same PT/massage therapist and it ha kept me moving and lifting Skyler.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

It's these times, (when you stick your whole foot in your mouth), that I'm certain we're related. Twins, separated at birth, perhaps?

Casey Freeland said...

As your husband, boyfriend, significant other, I just have to say that I wouldn't be two cents worth of OK for Mr. 6'4" former school mate coming over to the house to massage anything. I'm very happy your pain has subsided though. :)

Vodka Mom said...


And the massage was to DIE for.

Vodka Mom said...

and yes, Sara.....red rover, red rover, send Sara right over.

jwg said...

Is he single? Straight?

Notes From ABroad said...

So far I am lucky in that no therapies or massages are needed for pain. I am not sure I would even want a massage. But if ever find myself in the position of needing someone ... for anything ... I will remember the groin massage line. snert..I can't even type it without giggling.

Carol said...

Loved this story! I'm currently visiting our little town in "Oregon"- maybe I should call "Jack"!

Anna Whiston-Donaldson said...

you sure do know the pick-up lines!

Dorothy said...

Holy cow, I snorted at the "come over and massage my groin" gambit! Too too funny!! You are hilarious. Omgosh, I love coming in here. Thanks for sharing the laughter with us, I needed it.

Hon, I dx you with Foot in Mouth disease, that's probably why you hurt so much! Feel better since he massaged that foot out of there for ya? Hehehe.

I get monthly deep tissue massages myself, I was getting to the point of "everything" hurt too. Now I feel sooo much better. I'm in love with my masseuse, I threatened to stalk her if she ever moved away. It cost more than I like but I decided that it was not a luxury, it is a necessity for me.

So glad you did this for yourself. Good for you!