1. Tiny creepy crawly insects with a million legs are called millipedes.
2. Millipedes love old, damp stone houses.
3. A broken hose on a water heater can leak for a week or two or THREE until it finally bursts, causing water to fill a basement until finally you have an in-ground pool. You won’t notice it at first, because you might be on an adventure and the daughters who are home working won’t venture into the basement while you’re gone.
4. Millipedes love old, damp stone houses that have a basement full of water. In fact, they love it so much they might invite, oh, let’s say one BILLION of their closest friends.
5. Millipedes can’t swim.
Nothing stinks MORE than a BILLION dead millipedes floating in a basement covered in water.
(Oh there’s more…but I’m so damn tired I can’t finish the story. It does have a happy ending. Well, maybe NOT for the millipedes…)