Dear Members of the Universe, President of the WIC
organization, Publishers of Nutrition Magazines, Fitness Organizations and anyone else who MIGHT need the services of an adorable,
brilliant, slightly bitchy 24 year-old nutrition graduate from Smithsylvania State University:
The daughter AND the mother in this small, tiny apartment are desperately seeking an entry
level position in the very popular and apparently competitive field of Nutrition, Dietary Science, Exercise-Craziness, or
all out crazy healthy organic gluten-free living.
(She) Will work for an incredibly high salary so that she
can begin to pay back the five BAZILLION dollars she took out in student loans (while
her parents were divorcing) while attending the five-year program at said
University. Sure, she worked two
and sometimes THREE jobs during said five years, but only managed to accumulate
more SHOES, clothing, several very nice TANS and who knows what else.
She may also work for free as long as you can guarantee
her a job FAR, FAR, FAR away from
her mother. (And don't worry if she needs to re-locate....I packed her bags MONTHS ago....)
There. Now, for all that is holy, please, please let the
job offers begin……..
