I’m 56 years old, and I have finally discovered what a
“grown-up” relationship really looks like.
I shake my head and try very hard not to regret many of the
moments of those 56 years, but I’ve realized in the last year that I had no
idea what a real, honest to goodness GROWN UP relationship really was.
I have three incredibly horrible/wonderful children, and
remind myself every single day how thankful I am for them. It’s because of them that
I’ve come to know the real meaning of joy, true love, despair, fear, great
pride and gratitude. It’s also
because of those three souls that I can’t regret
the many years I spent in an unfortunate marriage. (If I wasn’t still raw from the fact that someone who shall
not be named managed to steal ½ of my TEACHER’S retirement, I might actually
thank him for those children.)
Last year The Powers That Be took pity on me. They knew I
finally loved and respected myself, and I guess they decided I was ready to be
loved by someone else. But this
time they sent someone my way who is kind, generous, loving, handsome, funny
and who can dance like nobody’s business.
They sent me a real man.
You know what I’ve realized a grown-up relationship means?
Most of you are probably lucky enough to already know, but I’m going to share my
own earth shattering realizations
about what a real man in a grown-up
relationship really does.
First, a real man doesn’t play any crazy games. He doesn’t
wait to call you, he doesn’t ignore your text messages or phone calls, and he
makes you feel like you are the only and best partner in the world. He loves to
hear your voice in the morning, and wants to hear it before he goes to sleep. He
reminds you each day that you are important to him and that you are an
important part of his life.
Second, he’s honest. He tells you when you are wonderful,
and when you are sounding a bit crazy. He tells you when you look beautiful and
when you might want to donate that
well-worn blue dress to the Goodwill.
He admires your children for their strengths, and gently reminds you
when they make a misstep. (Moms
are a bit blind in some instances…it’s that maternal component that brings on
an occasional bout of blindness.)
Third, he makes it easy for YOU to be honest. He listens to my boring stories, my
silly fears and my occasional trips into the world of crazy ranting. He never makes me feel like I should
hide any of these sides of myself, and always has a response that makes me
laugh. Sometimes I think I share
WAY TOO MUCH, but that’s because my heart is so at ease with this man.
And while I could go on and on, do you know one of the best things of all about being
in this particular grown-up
relationship? (Well, besides the fact that I’m crazy
about him…) He’s decided
that he needs to show me a world I’ve never seen before.
And when I say the world, I really mean it.
Buckle up, cause vodkamom’s adventures have been raised to an entirely new level.....
