Dear Sassy,
Let’s re-cap the most spectacular and memorable moments of
that long mother/daughter road trip that nearly killed me; shall we? (Because I adore lists, I’ve managed to
whip up a top five.)
5. I know that
you’ve suffered hearing loss after those bazillion
ear infections, and that the hearing loss only seems to come into play when I ask you to DO something, but
that doesn’t mean you have to BLAST the music while we are in the car, for six
straight hours. (And now I am the
one that is suffering from hearing loss.
What? WHAT????)
4. Yelling at
me every time I asked you nicely if you wanted a meal is no way to prep your
mother for the “I need a mani” request. Here’s a hint- you can acquire much
more with sugar than with, oh, let’s say yelling. (And tossing the nail polish I handed you on the couch
only sealed the deal.)
3. Laughing
hysterically on the beach about so many things
was the best way to get your mother to forget #4. (That was the best money I spent all vacation. Still wiping eyes…)
2. Discovering
that you had NOT spent the night somewhere in Mystic on Tuesday night but that
you were actually sound asleep in the middle of the air mattress that had
seriously deflated in the middle of the night was a major (comical) relief. The fact that we had already gone
to Starbucks thinking you were somewhere in Mystic and failed to take you was
not, in fact, comical to you.
(Which was unfortunate, cause we laughed our @$$es off.)
1. But the
piece de resistance surely came when you decided to play me your favorite song on your Ipod which was connected
to the car radio on our ride home. And then you insisted I listen to the words.
However, I must say that you are probably the ONLY twenty
year-old daughter who has the balls to blast “Bouncing on my @ick” while her mother is in the car.
(Yes, you totally trumped
Golden Boy’s singing Justin Timberlake’s “@ick in a Box” to me while on the
way home from the pool. My
ears are still burning.)
