God KNEW I needed to laugh every day…and so he handed me Frank - on a silver bloody, hysterical platter.

Today was the DAY of trick-or-treating in our neck of the woods, and it made for a wonderful crazy day full of excitement.

I stood outside the classroom ready to greet the children, and leading the charge down the hall was my man Frank. He leaves school most days claiming (in a LOUD and FURIOUS voice) that he is NEVER EVER coming back.

He lies.

Not only does he come BACK, he runs down the hall with a smile, arms wide open for a hug and plows into me like a mac truck with no brakes.

THAT is how I start each and every day. (And I love it.)

This morning, however, I immediately noticed something different about our Frank.

“Frank!! You’ve got GLASSES! They are so cool!”

He smiled and said, “Now I will be smarter, and will know ALL my letters and stuff. And prolly be gooder.” (If I could get my hands on a class set of THOSE glasses, I’d be set.)

We all oohed and aahhed over Frank’s glasses most of the day, and he smiled and told story after story (in his low gravelly voice) about how he got them from the “doctah” the day before.

He carefully placed them in his glasses case when we went to recess, and promptly returned them to his nose when we came inside.

At the end of the exhausting day, I started putting the chairs on top of the tables. I had shooed the excited trick-or-treaters to be out the door for their night of craziness and was praying that I could make it home before I passed out.

Then my school phone rang. It was Frank’s mother, calling to check on his behavior for the day. Apparently his night of candy collecting was contingent upon a positive report.

I not only gave her a glowing report, I also commented that his glasses were the highlight of the day.

“Glasses? He was wearing GLASSES?”

“Um. Yep.” I answered.

“Were they round wire rimmed glasses with a tree-frog case? God, that kid is driving me CRAZY!!”

Frank was wearing his brother George’s glasses. All. Day. Long.

And George? He had given them to Frank in exchange for the sticker chart Frank had brought home last week FULL of stickers. He decided he didn't want the glasses anymore.

Apparently a fairly new pair of glasses WITH a case is an even exchange for a card full of glow-in-the-dark Star Wars stickers.

I can’t WAIT to see our Frank tomorrow.

(If I had the energy, I would run to the dollar store for glasses for the whole class. Wouldn’t THAT render him speechless???)


Brian Miller said...

hehe. did you tell his mom he needed a pair himself?

Liss said...

oh my that Frank is a crack up!! Love him to bits and I don't even know the kid!

Vodka Logic said...


and I ask again, can I have your job

J.J. in L.A. said...

I'm surprised that kid (typed fondly) didn't get a headache from all that glasses wearing.

Poor mom! As the sister of 5 boys I can just imagine her frustration, remembering the stuff my mom had to put up with. lol!

High Heeled Life said...

Oh my ... I think though everyone needs a little Frank in their life. Maybe not 7 days aweek.. smiling... at least at the end of the school day he goes home... xo HHL

Anonymous said...

I once had a kid that convinced me his middle name was joesph. I said goodbye to him one day using his full name! His dad looked at me and laughed and said he didn't even have a middle name! I think it was great especially since he was an ESL learner!

Mishelle said...

Have you started nightmaring about him yet? I know that sounds bad but back when I was married and had a child in my daycare room like Frank I used to call out his name sometimes in the middle of a frustrated nightmarish type of bad dream.

I was asked how the name belonged to and why I always sounded so frustrated when I said it.

I really did love that child... he just drove me around the bend sometimes. Yeah... around the bend, down that street, over the hill to the Insane Asylum... but he was so sweet.


Boom Boom Larew said...

Ha! Perfect! I heart this kid!

Mellodee said...

Oh that Frank!! What a kick! All day long in his brother's glasses! HAH! Also it's obvious from his mom's comment, that he doesn't save his specialness just for the classroom....his home life must be a carnival too!

But didn't he take good care of his brother's glasses?


A pity (sort of) that you only have him for a year. I bet the years ahead will be interesting for every teacher (scout leader, youth minister, coach, principal, district superintendent, and College Regent!)he ever encounters!

Everyday Goddess said...

Tee hee! What a cutie pie, I'm glad he's around to keep you laughing.

Irish Gumbo said...

Kid knows a good deal when he sees it (heehee)

Steven Anthony said...

I can't stop laughing...Gosh I love that frank...lol

Joanie M said...

Oh, I laughed out loud when I read about GEORGE'S glasses!!!

Hey! Give Frank credit... he didn't steal them! He traded with George fair and square!

Jen said...

LOL. I love how he had all the stories about getting them from the doctor. He's going to be a writer when he grows up.

Expat mum said...

Didn't see that ending coming. We need to remember Frank's name - he'll be collecting an Oscar in about twenty years time.

ChiTown Girl said...

bwah hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! {deep breath} hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! {deep breath} hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
SHIT! I just peed my pants!

Captain Dumbass said...

Frank is awesome

Brenda Susan said...

I. Love. Frank!

Cheryl D. said...

I'm guessing he really wanted to go trick or treating and the glasses made him "gooder."

SSP said...

lord knows I would trade a pair of glasses for a sheet of stickers i f i thought it would make me gooder...wait, I WEAR glasses...dammit I want my stickers back!

Joanna Jenkins said...

Frank is the man!

Gaston Studio said...

Like everyone else, I just love Frank. And good on his mom for calling to check on his behavior; she sounds like a good one.

So glad Frank and his brother's glasses gave you a laugh today!

Elaine said...

This boy is awesome. You could never make stuff up as good as this!

Karen said...

I am Loving these Frank stories!! He is quite the character. So glad you have him in your day. Sounds like he came at just the right time. :-)

a Broad said...

LOL !!!
That is the LAST thing I expected !
I totally Frank ... and you :)

We all need a little Frank in our lives, don't we? :)

a Broad said...

That was supposed to say I totally love Frank... and you.

Wild Child said...

We all need a Frank in our lives. You have the best job! Frank, keep em coming, because God knows I need the laugh too.

WeaselMomma said...

That kid is a treat for us all!

DawnA said...

That is hysterical!

Laggin said...

I would TOTALLY trade my glasses for that sticker chart too. But then, I had lasik, so I don't really need them any more.

Lynn said...

He' is one of those, "At least I don't have to take him home with me." kids!
Very amusing!

noexcuses said...

Have you thought about using your posts as a "Frank" Journal? I'm sure his mom would love to have something like it as a parting gift next spring! You go Frankie!

Suzy said...

Next time Frank will probably trade his brother for a frog.

cozmikgrl30 said...

ROFL!!! This was great! I love your Frank posts! What a personality.

SheilaC said...

And thank YOU for making Me laugh with your Frank stories every day. I look forward to his antics each day :)


CSY said...

I know I'm a few days late - but that's what happens when you get old...have I told you how much I LOVE Frank?!?!?!?! He's AWESOME!!! At least he took care of his brother's glasses and didn't break them.

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

I adore Frank. His poor, poor Mama, though!

Zip n Tizzy said...

OMG!!! I have found Zip's Doppelganger! He was doing nearly the exact same thing last week and we did have to go to the dollar store!

Everything you've written about Frank (I'm catching up) has resonated with me but now I'm starting to wonder? You're not actually Z's teacher are you?!

LegalMist said...

Just catching up on my blog-reading after a couple of months of ignoring it all.... this is absolutely hilarious, and totally made my day! Thanks. :)

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