Number of times I snapped Jeffrey’s pants for him today? Four.
Number of coats I had to zip up before recess? 17.
Number of coats I had to UNZIP after recess? Two. Why is it easier to get them off than on?
Number of times I had to tie Jane’s tie-dyed shoelaces that are so slippery they won’t stay tied? Five. (How DO they untie when they are triple knotted? HOW?)
Number of children I had to send to the nurse after they picked their noses so much they BLED? Two.
Number of times my boobs got hit while a little one was trying to get my attention? Five. At least. (Tightwad might wonder why they are all bruised this weekend. Or not.) Why can’t I be taller? A good four inches would certainly get them out of range. (I should go get that nursing bra back – then I wouldn’t feel it!)
Number of squished raisins I had to pick up after school? A gazillion. And a half.
Number of naps I’ll be taking after school today? One. And heaven help the person that tries to wake me up.